Should I let my baby cry it out?
Real Mom Problem
“I never thought that I'd consider CIO but I've had a few mom friends that have had great luck with it.”
- 1. Cry-it-out is a very controversial topic. You will hear different advice from every mom!
- 2. Many moms report that their children turned into great sleepers after using the cry-it-out method
- 3. Many moms prefer other sleep training methods, where moms teach the baby to fall asleep on his or her own without letting them cry
- 4. Some moms try a modified version of cry-it-out, or "compassionate CIO"
- 5. Always consult with your baby's doctor about whether your baby needs nighttime feedings and whether cry-it-out will work for you
Real Mom Solutions
It's hard to get the "right" answer when it comes to cry-it-out, or CIO. Moms have very varied opinions and experiences to share. Check out these tips from moms to help you determine if this sleep training method is right for you and your baby.
Cry It Out Worked for Us
I chose to do it with my son because he was waking 12+ times a night and we were both getting barely any sleep to the point we were both getting sickly. To me, the benefits of getting sleep were outweighing the cons of cry-it-out. It only took a week to get him sleeping how I wanted him to sleep (I still wanted him to wake twice a night for breastfeeding).
I have let my daughter cry it out since four months. She figured it out and now she knows when in her crib and her music is playing, it's time for night night. I can even be in her room moving around and cleaning and she will go right to sleep! It worked wonders.
Despite the nay-sayers who claim that letting our child cry-it-out will traumatize them and make them hate sleep-time, the OPPOSITE is true with my 2-year-old. He loves naps and bedtime!
I did it with all 3 of mine and got great sleepers in under a week.
Try Modified Cry-It-Out
We usually never let them cry for more than half an hour, and you should see me holding the monitor staring at it. Usually they don't have too many times where they just keep crying, usually they give it up after about five minutes and go to sleep.
We practice compassionate CIO method. I lay them down, dry and fed after our evening routine (reading to them, singing to them and rocking them) and then we allow them to cry for 20 minute stints before going back in, making sure they are still dry, calming them down, and then lay them back down again for another 20 minutes. Depending on the kid, this could go on for hours, but in my opinion, it is best for everyone (baby included) to learn how to sleep through the night before they get set in the habit of not sleeping well. If they wake up at night, I go in and check their diaper, and if they are past needing nighttime feedings (around 8 months old unless otherwise directed by a doctor), I lay them back down again and repeat the original formula.
I will let him cry for up to 15 minutes if he is only whimpering. As soon as he starts shrieking I will go in and pick him up
No Crying for Us!
I did a lot of CIO with my first and in the end it made him insecure and even more needy. I refuse to do that this time. To me it just makes more sense to calm them when they first get upset than spend an hour listening to them cry, to end up getting them and cuddling them anyway.
Babies cry for a reason, even if that need is just a moment in your presence. If you want your baby sleeping better the best thing to do is to have a routine and give it time. You can more kindly try to teach your baby to fall asleep on his own, if you want to try that, but it will take a lot more work & patience than cry it out.