What should I do if I'm disappointed with my baby's gender?
Real Mom Problem
“Of course my first priority is a healthy baby. I am not upset that I am having my third boy. However, I still get upset every now and then that I won't ever have a daughter. It has been 12 weeks since I found out. Will I ever get over it?”
- 1. Don't feel guilty; your feelings are normal and common
- 2. Consider talking about your feelings with a close friend, relative, or counselor
- 3. Remind yourself that a healthy pregnancy and baby are most important
- 4. Think about how happy you'll be when you meet your baby, no matter what the gender is
Real Mom Solutions
If you had your hopes set on a particular gender, it's natural to feel disappointed if the baby you're carrying is actually the opposite gender. Learn how these moms got over their disappointment and got excited for their baby.
It's OK to Feel Disappointed
I wanted my son to be a girl. I was disappointed, but I love him so much and love his personality. I hated being disappointed because it felt selfish, but I think it's natural with some women.
I understand feeling disappointed. I thought this baby was a girl. I was wrong; we are having a boy. I'm a little disappointed.
Well, I have one girl and three boys, and when I had baby number three, I cried! And I will cry if this new baby is a boy! I don't care what people think, I am just so sick of blue and I have no clue what I will name the baby if it is a boy.
I had terrible gender disappointment with this baby. I was so sure this would be a daughter. The whole pregnancy was different from my other three. When they told me boy, I was calm and when the ultrasound was over I went to the restroom and through my tears thanked God for this child. I was heartbroken to find out it would be another son, but it's more because I don't get to have the experience of a daughter. This baby boy is still loved and very much wanted and anticipated by all.
I'm sure lots of moms feel gender disappointment at times whether they admit it or not!
Birth Will Help You Get Over It
I just had my fourth boy. We found out it was a boy at 17 weeks. It took me a bit of time to get over it. I cried a lot. At delivery, I was still slightly hoping it would pop out a girl. So was my husband. But when HE came out, we were smitten. We couldn't imagine not having his little face be a part of our family.
Gender disappointment is pretty common. That is one reason why we decided to keep our last three a surprise. It's a lot harder to be disappointed about the gender when you are holding your new little one.
It's natural to want one over the other, especially if you already have children I'd imagine. I'm sure it will go away when you see that little face for the first time.
You'll feel better about your gender disappointment when you meet the little one. You'll forget all about this "disappointment."
Once our son was born, that's all it took. I wouldn't trade him for anything. Just give it time. You will be happy with your baby.
Accept What You're Given
When I first found out I was having our third girl, we were disappointed but knew we would love baby no matter what. Plus, we are experts on girls now!
God gives us what we need. I'd like another daughter, but if a son is in the plans that's great too.
I was a bit sad at the fact that I'd never have a son. But I realized I have what I'm meant to have. I have daughters for a reason. Just take it one day at a time.
I'm grateful I can have kids because a lot of women out there can't. That's how I think about it.