Should I have a baby shower if this is not my first child?
Real Mom Problem
“I feel bad about not having a second shower. It's not about the gifts for me; it's about celebrating that a new baby is coming into the world. But at the same time, I feel selfish wanting a shower, like people will think it's greedy.”
- 1. Moms choose to have a shower for babies beyond their first for many reasons, from having the opposite gender to big age gaps between kids
- 2. Many moms worry about appearing greedy; try registering for low-priced items, or having a gift-less celebration instead
- 3. If a shower isn't for you, your friends and family can help you find other ways to celebrate your pregnancy and baby
Real Mom Solutions
A new baby is always a reason to celebrate, but does that mean another shower? See what these moms had to say about having second -- and third and fourth! -- baby showers and then decide what's right for you.
These Moms Say Celebrate Every Baby!
Baby showers, to me, are about celebrating new life. Every child should be celebrated!
Nothing wrong with baby showers for every pregnancy. In my culture, that's what we do. Every baby is a celebration and each baby deserves that shower. I say go for it.
I personally do not enjoy baby showers, but I see nothing wrong with having one for your second baby. And what difference does it make if it's your first or your fourth? They all require baby items.
It's not for me, but I see why people do it. My sister has two girls but there are almost eight years between them so she had two showers. I also know people will do it if there are two different genders.!
I have three girls and had a shower for each one. With my second daughter, it had been several years and we had already given away or sold almost everything. With my third daughter, number two was only 17 months old, so we had more of a celebration than an actual shower. We invited both males and females, and told them that gifts were not necessary. The same people came to all three parties; some brought gifts, some did not. I have attended baby showers for some women's fourth and fifth babies. I feel like showers are meant to celebrate a new life being born, so why should only the first be celebrated?
I felt like I was being greedy having a second shower. But if you really need the help, don't be afraid to have a baby shower. It is celebrating a new baby. If it would make you feel better about it, make sure your registry has the cheaper of the items and not full-out expensive. I don't like presents because for some reason I feel guilty when getting them.
Especially when your kids are far apart in age, I don't see a problem with having a second shower. I love the idea of celebrating a new addition to the family.
Some Say No to Second Showers
I have decided to not have a baby shower for this one and my mom just posted my registration and told people where I am registered.
I know second showers happen more often now, but there is no way I could justify having another for myself.
I think it's tacky and greedy to have a shower for a second baby.
I'm pregnant again and our families are already talking about a shower. I'm against it; I think it makes me look greedy!
Consider Other Celebrations
I think a "meet the baby" party is better than a second baby shower.
This time instead of a regular shower where the ladies come and watch me open presents, we are doing a big cookout so all of our friends and family can come and have fun. Apparently this idea isn't new and there are even super cute invitations; they call it a baby-q (like barbeque)! This one is a boy and my first was a girl. So I registered for soaps and lotions, wipes, and a few odds and ends we need like a mattress cover, crib-rail cover, etc., but clothes we are hoping for hand-me-downs.
Maybe a small brunch with close friends and family to celebrate, and a diaper raffle (bring a pack of diapers, be entered to win a raffle prize). If you're in need of the bigger items (stroller, bassinet, etc.) you can shop secondhand stores. A lot of them have barely used items for half the price or less! You can also check out craigslist.org or other online secondhand sites.