When should I let my teen go out on a date unsupervised?
Real Mom Problem
“I told my 16-year-old daughter that I didn't want her to date until next year, when she is 17. I don't think she is ready to date just yet. She thinks I am being too hard on her.”
- 1. Consider your teen's maturity level and sense of responsibility
- 2. Talk to your teens about respect for themselves and others
- 3. Be sure they know they can talk to you and can call you at any time for any reason
- 4. Keep communication open
Real Mom Solutions
Letting your teens go out on a date without you there to supervise can be a scary thing for parents. See how these moms dealt with the dating age.
We Allow Dating at a Certain Age
17 is an appropriate age for dating for both boys and girls. Puberty is a difficult stage for both parents and teens. I know hormones are going wild and curiosity is driving the whole house crazy. I think they should be allowed chaperoned dating at 15, but not alone until 17. By this point they are well aware of consequences and have usually worked too hard towards any goals they may have to mess them up.
Our unsupervised dating rule for both kids was 16. When they were younger than that, if there would have been someone of the opposite sex that they wanted to spend time with that person could come to the house or go along with the family to the movies, dinner, etc. 100% supervision was required. Older than 16, we just have to know the person, where they were going, and when they would be back, unless we were driving which is what happened most of the time.
My daughter is 14. Rule #1: You have my trust now to date. If you lose it, then it's gone and you lose all privileges. Rule #2: Everything must be cleared by me. Rule #3: No driving in anyone's car without my permission first. Rule #4: I must meet the parents. Same phone rules apply as before and if grades or behavior slip, you don't go out. I am happy for my daughter and I think that helps her stay a good kid. She tells me everything. And I don't overreact.
16 or 17 is an appropriate age for dating. And with that I am talking about actual dating; like going out together, not hanging out at school and talking on the phone sometimes. To me that isn't really dating.
Our daughter can date at 17 on her own, with a curfew.
We Allow Dating Depending on Maturity
I think it depends on the maturity of the kid. Probably around 16 or 17, though.
I have 3 girls and 1 boy. I approached each of them differently with dating. There are no hard-and-fast rules (like no dating until 16 or no boyfriend or girlfriend until 15, etc.). My oldest started dating early and dated older boys. My second daughter is 18 and has never been on a date. They are all different and should be handled differently
Honestly, it depends on my child. I have a 15 year old who has no desire to date yet. When the situation arises, we'll discuss it.