How can I help my tween who's slow to develop?
Real Mom Problem
“My 12-year-old daughter stuffed her bra today. She's an A cup. I know she just wants to grow up already.”
- 1. Remind your child that all kids develop at different rates
- 2. Point out the benefits of being a late bloomer
- 3. Talk to your preteen's doctor if you have concerns about his or her slow development
Real Mom Solutions
It can be tough for a preteen who's developing at a slower rate than all his or her friends. Find out from these moms how you can make your tween's slow development less of a struggle.
Help Her to Feel Like Everyone Else
My 12-year-old has no signs of anything, but wanted a bra because she has to change clothes in Phys Ed for middle school and most of the other girls have bras. I remember how mean girls are.
If your daughter wants a training bra, buy her the bra! There are plenty of pretty sports-type bras that are completely flat, so she doesn't even need breast buds to wear one and feel comfortable. Kids typically need to feel like they fit in during the tween years, and a bra is an easy fix (as opposed to her trying to fit in by experimenting with alcohol or tobacco).
Be Positive, Honest and Supportive
I told my daughter that puberty hits everybody at different times and sometimes having breasts is more of a hassle than a blessing. I told her that a lot of time gets spent shopping for shirts that will fit your breasts and your waist. Not to mention shopping for comfortable bras or exercise clothing so you don't bounce.
Just be sympathetic while being upbeat. Help them develop a keen sense of humor, and be unconditional with love, etc. Also, help set them up for success focusing on their true talents and passions.
I would explain that we all develop differently and that there is nothing that we can do to change that. I would find ways to help her feel comfortable with her body.