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Do you think that husbands cheat more often now because more women (wives) have depression and don't want to be with their husbands?

Just a random thought that I had when I was looking at all of the journal posts that say they have depression and are trying to get out of it. What do the husbands think? Do they say "well, I'm not getting any at home because she won't and I haven't gotten any in so long so I'm gonna go and find someone that will."?


Asked by Anonymous at 9:26 AM on Jan. 3, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (16)
  • I think you may have a point. If you spend enough time on here you will see a million questions about relationships from women who are depressed, no self esteem and they are always mad at their husbands. Then they complain because their husbands are not nice to them or give them affection. OK, who would want to be affectionate with someone who is always putting themselves down and pissed off all of the time? Relationships are a two way street. We cannot expect our men to be Knights in shining armor while we are the Wicked Witch of the West.


    Answer by Magpie75 at 5:40 PM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • I sure hope not. I think that if you are in a relationship then that means the bad with the good. I would hope that the husband would stick it out and try to help his wife not just care about his needs.

    I have a friend who has been sick for a very long time, about 7 years. Her and her DH have had good times and bad and i am sure it is very stressful. I think what helps her get through is knowing that he is there for her,

    So I guess I would hope not, but I am sure it does happen more then I would like to think

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 9:31 AM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • Definitely not. You don't marry someone for sex. You marry someone in sickness and health. I think saying that offers men a giant cop out or excuse for when they cheat. My SO and I are away from each other for months at a time due to his work and I expect him to have the restraint to keep it in his pants. I think men cheat because they're not held accountable for their urges and don't love their wives/partners enough to stay faithful.

    Answer by kabbot01 at 9:33 AM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • Wow never heard that one before. If the woman has deperssion or the husband for that matter it is both spouses responsibility to help things along. I have depression and things have gotten trying and not so pleasant between me and my husband. Once he realized that while I'm in an emotional downfall he needs to pick up the slack so that I can get stronger things started to look up for us. Yes I still have bad,days and am still on meds but an hopeful that the end is near as far as depression goes.
    While my husband enjoys sex he will not go looking for it elsewhere. He will annoy the snot out of me until he get's some! lol

    Answer by AmandaH321 at 10:26 AM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • Hmmmmm..... I guess that does happen. I'm not saying its right, or okay, but If a woman can't pull herself out of it or doesn't get the help she needs, her husband may feel helpless and want to just be happy again. It may just be easier than sticking by her side. Sad as it is.....

    Answer by drowninginboys at 10:44 AM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • I'm finding that most woman, that "have Depression", is because... they got married to Men in the first place, usually its the men and the relationship that cause the depression......

    Answer by Kay300 at 11:18 AM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • I read where ppl turn to others who make them feel good. So if a wife welcomes a husband home and has a peaceful home environment I'm sure that most men are sympathetic to her feelings and depressions. However, if a woman, depressed or not, makes her husband feel unwelcomed and unappreciated in his own home I can see where he might look for someone else to appreciate him. As for sex, I'm sure men do want that but it's been my experience that men want attention far more than they want sex. They want their wife to WANT them, to make them feel desired - just like we women want from hubby. Depression can be a nasty thing and one needs to get professional help so she can be the kind of caring w they both want her to be.

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:31 AM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • my ex cheated on me and he told me it was because i was depressed. so i guess my experiences.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:43 AM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • I never think your looks are mood is what dirves a man to cheat. A cheating man will cheat when all things at home are perfect; if it's in him.

    Answer by Godswk at 12:25 PM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • I don't think that men cheat more often now than they have in the past... I just think we are more open about it. In university I took a course on the psychology of sex and read the Kinsey reports from the first year they were published, and people were cheating and having premarital sex back then too...they were just less open about it. I can see some men using this as an excuse for cheating, but I think it's a self serving excuse... cheating is a decision. I think a man who uses this as justification for cheating would cheat even without a depressed wife, he would just manufacture another justification.

    Answer by Freela at 1:17 PM on Jan. 3, 2009