Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

i know i need to leave my husband but he pays all the bills. the only job ive had is raising our baby. how do i start this prosses and get on my own two feet?

i know i need to leave my husband weve been off and on for the past year things just arent getting any better. but he pays all the bills. the only job ive had is raising our baby. how do i start this prosses and get on my own two feet?

Answer Question

Asked by Jese07 at 7:18 PM on Jan. 3, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • you start by looking for place that can help you move out and help you untill you get a job and learn how to support yourself

    Answer by butterscotch297 at 7:19 PM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • Find a layer. If you have been a SAHM, then you are entitled to alimony payments. Good luck!


    Answer by runawaybunny at 7:21 PM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • Start by learnign about services for single moms,then look into a prt time job,just to get into the habits of working and go from there.Maybe have a plan,a timeline for when u would go and work hard to meet those goals.This is one of the best questions I have seen here, u r taking charge of your life and I ,for 1,am very proud of you mom.I had to do it too, email me if u would like some more ideas and stuff. So proud of u...and me too now that I think of it dang it. :o)

    Answer by Bearsjen at 7:22 PM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • If you have a little bit of time before you plan on leaving him (unless it's a violent situation ... then you need to leave NOW), try volunteering for a non-profit organization or taking a computer/office course through your local community center. You want to build marketable job skills without jeopardizing alimony payments. If you have more time, try going back to school for a two-year degree or certificate. Even if you have to take out a student loan, it'll be worth it. Start saving as much money as you can - I mean put back every dollar you can spare and really start sacrificing and doing without. My mother went through a similar situation two years ago where she was a stay-at-home mom with no real job skills or start up money. She managed to save $15,000 and start her own after-school care business. Good luck!

    Answer by redmoonintexas at 7:33 PM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • See a lawyer or talk with social services about what to do and what your rights and obligations are. For example, it may be that if you leave then he can sue for desertion, although this may differ from state to state, Have a bank account in your own name and move money there. Start preparing for working outside the home.

    Answer by Bmat at 7:37 PM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • Also..if you can, put money away where he can't find it. Make copies of important papers: Marriage and birth certificates, social security numbers, bank account numbers, etc. Information you can and will need in the future. Prepare ahead of time...don't just leave without planning! Unless your in a violent situation...then just go!

    Answer by naturescape at 10:46 PM on Jan. 3, 2009

  • i had the same ex husband abused me and never cared about his daughter but even tho he paid the bills i had to get out and i did..i moved in with my mother and she helped me get a job and now that i am working she watches the baby and i save up money to support her instead of puttig it all on my mom...good luck

    Answer by haylinn1019 at 1:43 AM on Jan. 4, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.