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Should I let Go?

There's this guy. I literally spent an entire year with him. A year may not seem long, but nonstop almost 24/7. I recently stopped talking to him cause I realized I was getting too attached. No theres nothing wrong with getting attached, but he's sort of a loser. Now I don't mean a loser like a druggie or alcholic.. just he didn't finish High School. Wwere both young by the way.. i just need advice from older mom's with experience. H he says hes going to go back and I guess it doesnt matter cause even he goes back or not he's gonna get his GED So my problem now is I can't let go of him. I don't want him with anyone else. He really does love me. He always makes me happy. I love him more then all of my other friends because he was like my best friend. I tried moving on.. I tried tons of things. Hes a goodlooking guy, could have a lot going for him.. just doesnt put effort. He's not abusive and never tries to put me in danger

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:50 AM on Jan. 4, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (13)
  • Honestly, if you love him, stay with him. I never realized how much DOES NOT MATTER until I met Steve. We don't have much, but for the first time in my life I don't care. Don't get me wrong, Steve has a good job, (and diploma) but with me staying at home things are tight. You are a lucky, lucky girl if you really love him. The only thing that bothers me is that you asked for advice, which tells me you have reservations. You have doubts, which makes me question how strong your feelings truly are. Good luck, and remember, no matter what happens, things could always be worse.
    steveswife1130

    Answer by steveswife1130 at 1:01 AM on Jan. 4, 2009

  • You sound like you have such a good head on your shoulders. I would remain friends with him, best friends as you say. Encourage him to get his GED. And even if that doesn't work, he might still have ambition to succeed at something. Find out what that is and try to encourage that. Yes, education is important, but if he treats you well and makes you happy, that is a very strong thing to consider also. Just take it one day at a time. You are both young and have lots of time. If you two are meant to be together, you will be.
    hopelessnance

    Answer by hopelessnance at 1:06 AM on Jan. 4, 2009

  • thank you guys very much..
    you both gave me things to think about.
    and by the way.. i'm sixteen years old and
    junior.

    i appreciate it :)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:27 AM on Jan. 4, 2009

  • Things look one way at 16....and can look soooooo different at 26, 36, 46.

    Work on YOU first, OK? YOU without a guy. Who are you? What things do you like? What can you do? What are your plans and dreams? How are YOU going to change the world, or at least your little piece of it?

    When you know who YOU are, then you'll know what kind of man you need to be with. Maybe it is this fellow. Or maybe it's someone you haven't even met yet.

    You're 16. There is NO NEED to rush. If he really loves you, he'll wait for you.

    At the VERY least, finish school. OK?
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 2:01 AM on Jan. 4, 2009

  • I am going to tell you the same thing I told my step-daughter when she was 16 and am telling the 15 year old now. It is a tiny chance that you will meet the man you will marry while you are still in high school. It does happen, but rarely.

    What you should be considering is where you are going to college. Next it will be time to decide what to do with the rest of your life. Please get a college education. It will be the best thing you could ever do for yourself and your child. You would be able to support yourself and never have to stay with some loser because you can't provide for yourself and your child. Please, please, get an education and don't worry about boys. There will always be plenty of boys, but most people only get one chance to get a proper education.
    casperskitty

    Answer by casperskitty at 2:56 AM on Jan. 4, 2009

  • so you guys really think that i should let him go and stop talking to him?
    or be his friend..?
    or wait for him.?
    or try again to move on...?
    or beg his family more to encourage him to go back to school..?
    ...

    :(
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:11 AM on Jan. 4, 2009

  • You're putting too much pressure on yourself. If I were you I'd just keep things casual with this guy. Who knows maybe he's the one for you and you two will spend a wonderful life together. Maybe he'll just be a page in the story of your life and that's it. Who knows? I do know that you can take care of yourself and your baby. You don't have to focus all your spare energy on him. Put your time into parenting and job skills. Let the relationship simmer on the back burner and it will work out the way it should. Get yourself together regardless of what he chooses to do. Good luck!
    shmorris56

    Answer by shmorris56 at 3:12 AM on Jan. 4, 2009

  • oh im sorry if i didnt mention it before...
    im not a parent
    im only sixteen years old
    but ugh i cant even explain how much i like him..
    i tried writing it all above before i posted it and they wouldnt let me post it because what i wanted to say was so much.
    im crushed
    because im literally obsessed with him. and he really loves me too
    but i know he hates when i pressure him to think about the future or education. but then again it hurts me to be with him and just think that this all has to end one time or another because hes going to turn out to be .. you know.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:17 AM on Jan. 4, 2009

  • Why are you even on here if your not a mom HELLO its CafeMOM! DUH! And with that outta the way why are you even worried about it, you change SOOOOOO much between 16 and 18 and 20 and so on and so on, you dont even know fully who YOU are as a person......figure yourself out work on yourself and what you wanna do and if it's ment to be then it WILL be, Don't spend so much time worrying about "if he is the one" or "should you stay or go". Do YOU and the rest will fall into place, trust me I have so been there done that!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:46 AM on Jan. 4, 2009

  • i dont know because on those kid websites all the kids give me advice and the golddiggers and stuff.
    on here i thought moms that had experience, and older people could help me out.
    im going to listen to you guys by saying find out who I am ..
    but how?
    how do i find out who i am? do i let him go? go cry some more? go tell people who don't care? what?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:56 AM on Jan. 4, 2009

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