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A thought about restraining orders

There's always somewhere in news almost every single day of women being killed by ex's who have restraining order against them. I understand the logic of restraining orders but have any of you actually been better off with one in place or does a restraining order actually make ex's more angry and out of control? I am so sorry for those women in domestic violence cases, I'm just wondering has a restraining order worked and helped you or not? If not what do you in hindsight think would have worked for you instead of a restraining order?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:04 AM on Jan. 5, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • I had a friend who's restraining order was useless. The police told her to call when he was harming her. She said that would be too late because she would be dead.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:06 AM on Jan. 5, 2009

  • I had a restraining order against an ex bf because he threatened to kill me after we broke up. It worked for me. He was stalking me prior to the order but then after the order was in place I never saw him or heard from him again.

    It must have been just enough to have the threat on legal paper somewhere that he knew if I became hurt or was murdered that he would be the #1 suspect.

    Answer by girlneffy at 1:07 AM on Jan. 5, 2009

  • Some men do not care about the consequences. An object of desire cannot be stopped by a little piece of paper.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:13 AM on Jan. 5, 2009

  • I had to get one on an ex... and it kinda felt like just a piece of paper. It just pissed the guy off even more then when my windows were broken out the same day the police did nothing.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:08 AM on Jan. 5, 2009

  • My restraining order against my ex worked like magic. Every single violation lands them 10 days in jail at least in TN. I think a lot of times women give in and talk or communicate with the offender and this is what causes a lot of problems. It's true a piece of paper isn't going to stop someone who is going to kill or harm you no matter what, but why wouldn't you at least try to protect yourself. It stops them from obtaining a gun (if they don't have one already), has their weapons removed from them, is a permanent record, etc.

    Answer by KnoxvilleDoula at 10:32 AM on Jan. 5, 2009

  • More women are victimized by their partners on restraining orders with guns, not without. Don't think most of the abusers have guns already - hardly anywhere are gun laws on wait times enforced. Guns can be bought in shady pawns, off street, stolen -gun laws are useless.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:19 PM on Jan. 5, 2009

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