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Suggestions to keep 4 year old out of my bed

My oldest is 4 and has slept with us most nights since she was a baby. We have tried everything we can think of to get her to sleep in her own bed, but she always wakes up in the middle of the night and gets in our bed. My husband works nights, so most of the week it's just me in the bed. She never wakes me up getting into the bed, and I sometimes don't notice her until I get up. But some nights she's a horrible bed hog and can push me out of the bed. We've tried putting her back to bed (she will just wait and come back), rewarding her for staying in her bed, putting a gate up in her door (she can climb it), giving her a stuffed animal to sleep with, letting her sleep with her little sister. Nothing works. I don't feel comfortable shutting my door to keep her out because she's so young, and she has 2 younger sisters.

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Silvertears1275

Asked by Silvertears1275 at 7:31 AM on Jan. 5, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 4 (41 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • My dd is the same way. I dont worry about it when my dh is working nights to be honest. Most of my kids coslept until they got old enough to understand they needed their own beds. It does happen lol. In any case we did buy my dd her own toddler bed and the way we do it is we put her in that in our room and plan to move it slowly into her room which happens to be an adjoining room with ours. I know at my inlaws they are doing that and its been working.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 7:33 AM on Jan. 5, 2009

  • Just walk her back to her room if she wakes you when getting in. When you put her to bed you just have to keep telling her she must stay in her own bed. This is one reason why I don't agree with co-sleeping.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:54 AM on Jan. 5, 2009

  • I realize that it probably sounds silly, but talk to her about personal space and "me time". We did this when the boys were younger, then when they still did not give us our space, we put up two child gates in their bedroom door, one on top of the other so that most of the door was gated.
    vbongard

    Answer by vbongard at 8:05 AM on Jan. 5, 2009

  • One of my friends set the rule that their son may come in anytime he wants (he's now 9) - so long as he sleeps on the floor. Maybe set up a place for your daughter to sleep on the floor so she can still be with you, but not hogging the bed. Just make sure that as the other children grow, they're allowed in too if they choose.
    JPsMommy605

    Answer by JPsMommy605 at 10:25 AM on Jan. 5, 2009

  • We put a childproof thing on our daughter's doorknob on the inside, so she couldn't open the door. We also started to use a monitor so that if anything did happen and she couldn't get out, we could hear her.
    If that doesn't work, you can also try to put a timer on a night light and tell her she's not allowed to get out of bed until the light turns on in the morning. Good luck!
    NatashaBanks

    Answer by NatashaBanks at 10:29 AM on Jan. 5, 2009

  • Do what Super Nanny would do... keep marching her back to her bed... even if that's every 15 minutes. I would think you might not get AnY sleep for a few nights but it's consistent. Explain about personal space as the other commenter suggested.
    lynnard

    Answer by lynnard at 4:21 PM on Jan. 5, 2009

  • 'One of my friends set the rule that their son may come in anytime he wants (he's now 9) - so long as he sleeps on the floor. Maybe set up a place for your daughter to sleep on the floor so she can still be with you, but not hogging the bed. Just make sure that as the other children grow, they're allowed in too if they choose.'

    we have done this for our soon to be 4 year old, and it works great. she still comes in on occasions, but she's now decided her bed is more comfy and stays in it most nights.
    jcsmummy

    Answer by jcsmummy at 10:25 PM on Jan. 5, 2009

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