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emense guilt!!!!

i have this emmense guilt as do most working moms. i would love more than anything to be a stay at home mom and its not bc im lazy. i love working. in fact when my ex fiance and i agreed on having a fam i would work part time. but being a single mom does not give me the opportunity to live in a house and not in a crad board box while taking care of my daughter. my mother has to take care of her...which is a whole nother situation that i cant stand lol, but i havent really got to spend much time with her since i went back to work at 6wks old. i love my daighter and spend all the time we can onthe weekends but wehni get home i end up just giving her a bath and then putting her to sleep. i fell horrible how do all those single moms or even working moms deal?


Asked by SummerMom072208 at 10:54 PM on Jan. 5, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

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Answers (7)
  • No one loves your daughter the way that you do, and she knows that. Doing all of the things you do will only prove that to her. I grew up the daughter of a working single mom, and she's always been my hero. She is the strongest woman I know, and I hope that someday I can be half the woman she is. You'll be the same for your daughter. She'll know how much you go through to provide for her, and love you for that.

    Answer by desert_diva at 11:06 PM on Jan. 5, 2009

  • By working, you are doing everything you can for that little girl! You have nothing to feel guilty about. When you do get home, she knows you're the one giving her the bath, and you put her to sleep. She knows that every night, you will be there. You keep doing what you're doing. I do not know how single working moms do it, but you know what, you do it! You are going to be one great role model for your daughter as she grows up! Always remember that! Good luck to you!

    Answer by KJohnson4762 at 11:01 PM on Jan. 5, 2009

  • I totally agree! Kudos to you! She will have someone to look up to and respect! I know it must be hard, but you will get through it. And you are going to be able to give her wonderful opportunities that she might not have otherwise been given!

    Answer by GraciesMomLJP at 11:12 PM on Jan. 5, 2009

  • I learned my lesson after going back to work when my DD1 was 18 months old.
    I will not do it again. I'm staying home for a few years!!! IF I work it will not be more than 12 hours a week, and that will simply be to stay current in my career.

    I understand you feel you have to work, but surely there must be alternatives so you can at least cut down on hours...

    Answer by Liyoness at 11:16 PM on Jan. 5, 2009

  • As women and mothers we seem to have this incredible ability to be everything. Yeah it may suck now, but you are doing all you can.
    My mom was on her own with me and my sister. It was hard and she is the most amazing woman I know and I am glad that I have her too look up to. Through all that she went through till now she has grown. She loves being a grandma and says that she can now do things that she missed out on doing with us when we were kids with my kids.
    Just be strong, your baby loves you!

    Answer by AmandaH321 at 11:32 PM on Jan. 5, 2009

  • Let me tell you. I have immense respect for single moms. Honestly I don't know how you do it. As far as working goes. When I started a high risk pregnancy I came home from work and gave birth to a special needs infant... so I am home for good :) It wasn't easy but I did my research and found ways to make money from home without all that home based bussiness stuff. I can't garuantee you it will let yuo be a stay at home mom but it may be enough to go to part time. Who knows maybe you are smarter than me and will find a way to make it a full time income. If you want some help give me a shout. I can help you simply by telling you how I started and pointing to the resources that made it possible.

    Answer by humaniterian87 at 12:02 AM on Jan. 6, 2009

  • i understand how you feel. i am a single mom who works and goes to school and i feel guilty for not being home all the time but im doing the best i can and so are you and thats all you can do!

    Answer by lmaines22 at 12:18 AM on Jan. 6, 2009