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Ladies please Help !!!

I met someone online and I think im falling for him. Weve been talk for a while now. But the thing is hes only 19, but he will be turn 20 in a few mo. Hes in college and seem to have his head together. Im 32 and a mother. This is the first for me to meet someone online. Hes young I know and we are getting a little serious. I just want to know do you think Im wrong for talking to someone this young? Does Love have boundaries when it comes to age? Hes gonna come visit me soon what do you think i need to do. Oh yeah! everything is legit.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:31 AM on Jan. 6, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • Love knows no age. I would say meet with him and do exactly as the other ladies are saying. See how you feel once you REALLY geet to know him. Try not to move too fast. If you really seem to get along after seeing him for a while, then you'll know. But Everyone and ever situation is different. Maybe he will be too immature, or maybe he will be the perfect man for you. Just try to meet on common ground for a while. Don't let him have access to any part of your life that you feel uncomfortable with. Good luck!
    crazybeautifulh

    Answer by crazybeautifulh at 11:10 AM on Jan. 6, 2009

  • I don't see a problem with it. I know there are some 19 year olds are very mature for their age...even more mature than some 32 year olds.

    What I must admit that I find interesting is that you said he turns 20 in "a few months." That leads me to believe you are, in your mind, trying to make him sound older. So I'm thinking the barrier here that you have to get past is your own, not ours.
    AllAboutKeeley

    Answer by AllAboutKeeley at 10:34 AM on Jan. 6, 2009

  • My husband is 8 yrs younger then I am and I dont think it has boundaries however I will say I also dated someone 12 yrs younger and even though they seemed together they didnt have the life exp I had. My husband did because he was a dad himself and went through the death of his son, gf leaving him etc. Sometimes it is hard for younger people to understand parenting, especially if the kids are older, and divorce and things like that. Just tread lightly is my advice and see how he is in person, meet his friends and ask alot of questions.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 10:36 AM on Jan. 6, 2009

  • Yes I know what you mean but some times you are going to have to turn the other cheek, that is a big gap there you have already lived your life and his is just begining. Don't do it. He will probably be doing it for the sex and you will be doing it for the affection, sex and attention.
    Find some one local and more close to your age or someone is going to get hurt or it won't work out. You are suppose to be the mature one. Only celebrities do this...lol
    It might be fun at first but think of your kids. I know this might sound stupid but what if you guys do make it and when your kids grow (if they are girls) and he decides to fall inlove with them bc mom is too old for him by now. I mean it happens girl don't do it. Good Luck
    Butterfly1108

    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 10:42 AM on Jan. 6, 2009

  • I think that in this case it may have it's boundaries. He isn't even 21 yet and what is going to happen when he wants to go out and get a drink with friends and you cannot come along b/c you may not be able to find a person to take care of your little one that evening? Also, ask yourself how you as a mother would feel if there were a 32 yr old woman dating your 19 yr old son or a 32 yr old man dating your 19 yr old daughter for that matter? I dated a man 11 yrs older and I outgrew him b/c he had a been there done that attitude when it came to things that I wanted to do and he couldn't relate to my friends and their SOs. Sometimes age is a factor.
    micrespo

    Answer by micrespo at 10:43 AM on Jan. 6, 2009

  • I don't see anything morally wrong with this because you are both adults. HOWEVER, with that being said, I will bet that when you spend sometime together face-to-face, you are going to discover that he's not quite as mature as you may think. It's easy to seem mature when you are talking online, but after you spend some time with him, you may see more differences between the two of you than you had noticed before. When I was 30, before I was married, I dated a guy 20 years old. He was very sweet, and probably was mature for such a young man, but the more time we spent together, the more I felt like I was trying to relive my teen years with him. It got very tiresome! Any way, we broke up and I ended up marrying my husband, who is 10 years older than me! We've been married 8 years now. Good thing he doesn't feel that way about me I guess!
    Mishelly728

    Answer by Mishelly728 at 10:57 AM on Jan. 6, 2009

  • I totally agree with MICRESPO. He's probably interested because he's talking to an older woman and all that but when he hits 21 and he can legally go out to the nightlife scenary, I doubt he is going to want to stay home and play the role of husband/father.
    girlletmetellu

    Answer by girlletmetellu at 11:04 AM on Jan. 6, 2009

  • I would tread lightly and go slow. Each person is different and there are tons of times where the age thing didnt matter. On the other hand most the time it does. Im only saying this because i have seen it too many times. My grandma decided she would marry a guy 20 years younger. It was no surprise to us when he cheatted on her all the time. Whats going to happen 5-10 years from now when he wants his own kids? Everyone knows you change the most in your 20's. I am 25 and who I was and the things I did at 20 are no where near the same. I am not saying go for it or dont just be careful!
    Ms.MarineWife

    Answer by Ms.MarineWife at 11:09 AM on Jan. 6, 2009

  • I think you should proceed with great caution. A lot of times when a man this young is interested in a woman this much older, he is looking more for a mother than for a wife. If you want to meet with him in person, go ahead. I would definitely draw the boundary of no sex with him, and I would watch him very closely and study him very objectively for signs of what he is really looking for in a woman. There are many young men around today who have never experienced the love of a mother, and while they may think they are looking for a wife, they are in reality looking for what they have never had. It does not make for good marriages. And sex will blur your vision and keep you from seeing the truth about him.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 1:01 PM on Jan. 6, 2009