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Does anyone share legal joint custody with a parent who lives out of state?

My child's father says he wants legal joint custody. I do not agree at this point so he is gonna have to take me to court to get it. I don't agree because he really isn't in the picture. He lives on the other side of the world. He feels like he should get something for paying child support (his exact words). If he was actually doing anything to have a realtionship with the child (seeing him or calling) then that would be another story. Whenever he does call its just to fight about joint custody/name change/or bc and ssn. He didn't want these things until his mother told him he did. He didn't even know what joint custody meant. He is allowed to see the child whenever he wants to visit but I think visitation should be supervised because my son doesn't know him and plus his family said he was bipolar.

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Asked by Anonymous at 4:06 PM on Jan. 6, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (4)
  • I have joint custody wih the ex, he lives about 1000 miles away. I suppose the only real issue I have is that he doesn't see the kids very often, but when he has them, I let him keep them as long as possible (generally about 2 months). He is too busy being sorry for himself to realize how good he has got it, most women, I don't think, would let them have the kids like that and he doesn't talk to them very often because he is 'still getting over them being gone again' <-- his words.

    Answer by LostRogue at 4:26 PM on Jan. 6, 2009

  • My son's father lives in another state and we share joint legal. My attorney said it really did not matter because if there was a disagreement the parent with the most TIME gets the final vote. I have not had any problems yet (he is 5). His father has not even ASKED to make any major decisions.

    Answer by hotrodlassie at 5:09 PM on Jan. 6, 2009

  • Thank you for your responses I don' t think he will even want to make any decisions. I think he is just too busy listening to his mother (who is mad at me). I just don't understand why he is so passionate about getting legal joint custody and not the least bit passionate about seeing his kid or establishing a relationship with the child. He has seen the child 1 time

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:18 PM on Jan. 6, 2009

  • Please keep in mind that I am asking about joint legal custody and not joint physical custody...there is a difference.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:19 PM on Jan. 6, 2009

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