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2 Bumps

How do I know if I'm being verbally abused?

I'm called stupid, lazy, and a bitch regularly. If something is out of place I get screamed at. When something goes wrong or he's had a bad day he either ignores SS and I, bites our heads off or physically isolates us from each other. He has smacked SS before but never actually hurt him. I know that doesn't make it okay but sometimes I'm too scared to do anything and other times I'll jump in between them. He's never hit me. It's all verbal on my end but it makes me worry even more now that we have one on the way. Is he going to scream at her for crying like he does SS? I can't take SS with me if I leave though. What do I do? I'm only 19. I wasn't expecting to be a mother already and I'm so lost. This behavior just started last month and I've been with him since SS was 18 months, now 2. I seems to have started when he was getting swamped with mandatory overtime from the flooding. He works at the Lowe's distribution center and they were backed up because of everyone buying things to rebuild. I'm not sure if this is exhaustion or him showing his true colors.

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Asked by Anonymous at 6:15 PM on Nov. 1, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • It sounds like verbal abuse to me. Exhaustion excuses general grumpiness, not name-calling, not trying to make you feel bad about yourself.

    Answer by SWasson at 6:19 PM on Nov. 1, 2011

  • Have you ever chatted with his ex-wife about their marriage? Maybe there's a pattern to his behavior?

    You ARE being verbally abused, and it sounds like son (18 months?!) getting smacked borders on physical abuse.

    Take care of yourself and SS!

    Answer by GoodyBrook at 6:20 PM on Nov. 1, 2011

  • So you have been with him for only 6 months.. Yeah honey, that's abuse. Its time to go before it gets worse. Did you marry him?? If not who is SS ?? If he has a child from a previous relationship and is abusing a toddler, he needs to be reported.

    Answer by midnightmoma at 6:23 PM on Nov. 1, 2011

  • sounds like it to me,,,,,,,,,,,, if it makes you feel bad , sad , low self worth etc,,, its abuse

    Answer by letstalk747 at 6:33 PM on Nov. 1, 2011

  • Please leave him.....dont stay and think he will change...they never do.

    Answer by SLC3015 at 6:48 PM on Nov. 1, 2011

  • It's verbal abuse, yes..his true colors are showing because he's stressed but there will ALWAYS be stressful things in life, there's no excuse for how he's treating you. That's not love, it's pure cruelty and you need to get out.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:52 PM on Nov. 1, 2011

  • Get out. Go to a womens shelter and report him. they will intervene with ss. he is just going to escalate. get out now. it will only get harder when baby gets here. good luck. do not think he will change or make excuses for him.

    Answer by Nimue930 at 7:12 PM on Nov. 1, 2011

  • It is abuse and he needs to get help or you need to leave.


    Answer by Anonymous at 7:25 PM on Nov. 1, 2011

  • There's a better life for ya!

    Answer by Sarah961 at 11:30 PM on Nov. 1, 2011

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