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How does one tap into their inner child?

We have adopted our children. My son was a headbanger as an infant, then went to biting, the verbal. We have been in theraphy for 10 yrs. We are a wee bit exhausted and worried about his dicison making. We are worried about him knowing he should have pain and feeling pain yet not learning from it. He is now going on 14 and I worry about his self esteem and decision making. Any suggestions? My therapist thinks my pain over my son is associated with innner child and not having control over what he does.

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Asked by Anonymous at 11:44 AM on Jan. 7, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (3)
  • Once I made a list of all the things I thought I "missed" out on as a rolling down hills, water balloon fights, I don't really remember them all but then I chose a few and did them. I went out in the yard and rolled down the hill, sure I looked crazy but I had a blast. Anything you want to do, it is all about giving up order and control! Have fun.

    Answer by Rebecca727 at 12:46 PM on Jan. 7, 2009

  • Inner child doesn't care about control. Inner child cares about letting go of adult stuff and acting like a child with no worries. My inner child comes out to play much too often but I need plenty of playtime. I do all my responsible adult stuff (pay bills, go to appts, etc) but then I need fun time.

    Answer by admckenzie at 6:24 PM on Jan. 7, 2009

  • Let go a little... as toddlers we let them try to walk, but they fall. The only way to learn to walk is to fall. Well that is the same with big kids. As teens if we try to protect their every step, they cannot learn to live. Let him go a little and see how he does, let him know you will be there to cheer him on, but not catch his every step. Let him make little mistakes, and let life show him the consequences of those mistakes. It will help you let go a little and also give him the chance to show you he can. If you smother him, that will ruin his own self esteem too.

    Nobody said being a parent is easy. Love hurts when it's time to let go a little of the very thing you've protected all their lives. But unless we let go, how are the kids suppose to know/learn they can make it.


    Answer by MikkiB at 9:13 PM on Jan. 7, 2009

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