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Creative discipline for lying?

My 5 year old has picked up this really bad habit of lying and it is really concerning. I am starting to see now that his younger 4 year old brother is starting to copy this habit. I am trying to find some kind of creative way to punish him for lying. I think time out would not be enough but I also think soap in the mouth is to extreme and would try that only as a last resort and even then I would probably try hot sauce and not soap. The lying is beggining to get out of hand and I need to get this fixed right away. Any and all suggestions will be so appreciated. Thank you. Have a wonderful day!!!!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:05 PM on Nov. 9, 2011 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Answers (11)
  • I think it is pretty normal to lie about small stuff,, and they also lie about big stuff,,, DS told me that he had no homework on Monday (he is 6) I asked what is this sheet? He says a workseet from after care (that does happen) Lo and behold the next day I get a call from his teacher,, She says I am so sorry about your dog,, Billy says you are very upset, and you were not able to get his homework done,, I was like WHAT HAPPENED TO OUR DOG<, he had told her our dog got ran over and that I was at the VET all night until he died,,, UMMM our dog is fine,, so we are not allowing any cartoons for 2 weeks,, plus I go to school everyday and get the homework myself,,(in front of his class) I will do this until Friday,, we had long talk about lying and stuff, but usually taking something they value away has worked,, this is first WHOPPERin a while,, LOL!
    kimigogo

    Answer by kimigogo at 9:14 PM on Nov. 9, 2011

  • I can't think of any Creative ways right now but, i can tell you that using SOAP or HOT SAUCE is a Horrible thing to do to a child- that will not get the problem under control..

    daisyb

    Answer by daisyb at 9:14 PM on Nov. 9, 2011

  • Lying is normal for kids- you might want to read this:


    http://www.scholastic.com/resources/article/the-truth-about-lying


    It talks about why kids lie and  what kind of lies/ how they understand things at different ages

    charlotsomtimes

    Answer by charlotsomtimes at 9:14 PM on Nov. 9, 2011

  • The lady on Dr. Phil that used hot sauce was prosecuted. Just so you know.
    lowencope

    Answer by lowencope at 9:42 PM on Nov. 9, 2011

  • At their ages, it is perfectly normal for them to lie. They don't know they are lying. Try talking with them about the difference between telling a lie and making up a story.

    I second NOT using soap or hot sauce. Like someone else said, the lady on Dr. Phil that used hot sauce was prosecuted for child abuse.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 10:29 PM on Nov. 9, 2011

  • It may not be the best thing but it worked for me... My daughter(6 at the time) had the worst habit of saying something and then changing it/lying saying she didn't say it. Mostly she did this because she didn't want to be wrong about stuff (she's a know it all) but also just to lie to get out of trouble or get brothers into trouble. So one day I had had it! I jump up and down all excited and exclaimed that she and only her would get to have ice cream before her dinner! When she asked me all excited if she was really going to get her ice cream right then... I acted like I had no idea what she was talking about! I told her I had never said that and she wouldn't be getting any ice cream at all.
    I know. I know. It is terrible to lie to your kids but it worked. She made the connection immediately and through tears she appologized repeatedly for her behavior and the lying quickly phased itself out after that!
    mrs.cta1217

    Answer by mrs.cta1217 at 11:26 PM on Nov. 9, 2011

  • "Lying"?
    In what way exactly?

    This is normal behavior, no need to punish.

    We usually say "oh, really?! Well isn't that something."
    Not a problem.
    doulala

    Answer by doulala at 4:25 AM on Nov. 10, 2011

  • I agree with mrs.cta1217 - I read that suggestion from another lady as well. It's more or less about getting your child to realize how a person feels when you lie to them. Don't do it on anything huge though (like, I wouldn't say "We're going to DisneyWorld!") but something on the level of their lies. The other momma I read suggested saying you're going to make a favorite meal and when questioned when it's something else say "I lied."
    Cenchan

    Answer by Cenchan at 4:40 AM on Nov. 10, 2011

  • My response to lying is to look at the situation, discover the trigger or motivation. Usually, it's a safety issue, (not feeling safe enough to be truthful.) Lying & sneaking are fear-based behaviors. So my response is to address the underlying cause so that there's no need for the behavior, anymore.
    Punishment focuses on the behavior as if it's simple choice, deliberate badness. Punishment is about finding the right leverage to force someone out of a particular behavior. But a behavioral approach ignores the reasons & merely suppresses symptoms. If you view behavior as a signal or symptom, you respond by correcting the problem so the behavior resolves.
    Once the "need" for lying is no longer an issue, the behavior won't continue.
    It's a RELIEF to be able to be honest & authentic. When we make it safe for them, kids will be honest with us, even about upsetting or disappointing things. Then they have confidence to CONFIDE in us.
    girlwithC

    Answer by girlwithC at 2:13 PM on Nov. 10, 2011

  • when my son went thru his lying phase nothing would stop him until I started lying back...not about anything big, but stuff like saying i was making his favorite meal for dinner and then making something completely diferent...when he would question it I would say, "Oops, I was lying"...he got sick of it realllllll quick
    shivasgirl

    Answer by shivasgirl at 4:10 PM on Nov. 10, 2011

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