• In the Spotlight:
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Uggh Can't stop this feeling help!!!

Hello so im going to try to make a long story short. well heres the thing i have been having really bad anxiety about this baby that im having. well heres the reasoning it's a boy and believe me i want a boy and everything but heres the thing. my family has had all girls, and my aunt and my grandmother who both were pregnant with boys had stillborns. and it's really driving me nuts!!! like i wanted a boy so bad but i can't kick the feeling that its also going to happen to me, i keep trying to tell myself that its ok and i can have a boy and that it means nothing but i feel like i can't get excited until hes here in my arms. has anyone ever felt this way before i know its sounds silly but you don't know how much its kicking my butt!! someone please give me so hope!!!

Answer Question
 
WantBabySoon12

Asked by WantBabySoon12 at 2:24 PM on Jan. 7, 2009 in Pregnancy

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • Yup i will be happy to have a boy but in dhs side they have al girls and they disown one baby boy b/c it was a boy and not a girl. I will keep u in my prayers and pray you have a healthy baby boy.
    seasnakesc

    Answer by seasnakesc at 2:30 PM on Jan. 7, 2009

  • In the beginning of my pregnancy I was super paranoid about everything. I'd read or hear about all kinds of horrific things and then think about them for days. But then the more I read, the more I realized how truly rare many of these types of complications truly are. 90% of pregnancies end up in healthy births. I think we just hear about the stillborns and other things b/c people don't talk about the easy, normal births. Look around at all the people you know and see and tell yourself that all these people made it into the world, most without any complications at all. The fact that your aunt and grandmother had stillborns is most likely not genetic, so I wouldn't think about that.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:33 PM on Jan. 7, 2009

  • i have not experienced family members with still borns but i can tell you that i too had this ANXIETY eating at me. I kept hearing stories of people close to me who had still borns or lost the baby soon after giving birth and it scared me to DEATH!!! i harped on it and it ate me alive... it would seriously consume my mind cause i already had such a connection with my baby. You know wat got me through it.... talking to people who have experienced it, writing about it and keeping updates with my doctor about how i was feeling. i dont think the still birth that runs n ur family is a genetic thing or nething... everyone women carries different whether its a boy or a girl. Im sure your gonna have a BEAUTIFUL baby boy and make a great mother. how far are you??
    kwiseman19

    Answer by kwiseman19 at 2:35 PM on Jan. 7, 2009

  • Try thinking of this pregnancy as the end to the pregnancy curse. I'm sure that you are getting much better prenatal care than did either your Mother or Grandmother. Just know that it is more likely that they would detect any problems than not. Enjoy this pregnancy and this blessing, and try not to stress. Stress can have many negative effects, that can be prevented. Maybe pick out a name for your boy that signifies what a Blessing and New Beginning he will represent.
    Kimebs

    Answer by Kimebs at 2:36 PM on Jan. 7, 2009

  • Talk to your doctor and tell him/her about your fears of a stillborn baby, and why. Your doctor can watch your pregnancy more closely and order more ultrasounds to reassure you. There is no real reason that you will have stillborn boys more than anyone else. Sex isn't even determined by the woman. It is normal to worry about things while pregnant. I swear that I am totally irrational when pregnant! You have a valid concern, although I really don't think the baby will be stillborn based on what you have said. Good luck.
    Scimecamommy

    Answer by Scimecamommy at 7:07 PM on Jan. 7, 2009

  • I'm trying to relax at 6 weeks along. Both my mother and grandmother miscarried at 10 weeks for their first pregnancies. We are not them though. It'll be okay:-)
    ellie78

    Answer by ellie78 at 10:14 PM on Jan. 7, 2009

  • Thank you everyone for your answers!!!!! you really have helped me to reconsider what i'm thinking!!! i never knew that there were so many kind people out there like you guys!!!!! thank you so much for your guidance and advice!!!!! GOD BLESS YOU ALL!!!!!! I PRAY YOU ALL GET THROUGH ANY TOUGH TIMES!!!! AND I THANK YOU AGAIN FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART!!!!
    WantBabySoon12

    Answer by WantBabySoon12 at 1:05 AM on Jan. 8, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.