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a good friend told me that she would have to 'remove her 20mo old son if my daughter had another temper tantrum (she had one in front of her at the park). My daughter is 2 and in a different developmental stage. She told me that she was afraid her son was going to mimic the behavior and she wanted to prevent him from seeing this. I thought it was hurtful and absurd? Thoughts?


Asked by Anonymous at 6:31 PM on Jul. 16, 2008 in Toddlers (1-2)

This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • I don't think she was being very nice..First of all 2 year olds have tantrums..that is just the way life goes..if she thinks that keeping her child away from that is going to change things, she is fooling herself..She really doesn't seem like a real friend.

    Answer by Adnil at 1:34 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • I think that is hurtful too. But don't worry, she'll learn real quick that her son is no where near perfect either. She sounds like a snotty mom!

    Answer by feesharose at 6:34 PM on Jul. 16, 2008

  • That is absurd, I would politely tell her the next time it happens to go ahead and remove her child but understand later down the road that when her child does it I would remove my older child as to not influence a

    Answer by Anubis8733 at 6:38 PM on Jul. 16, 2008

  • Yes, I think it was hurtful, and as MOM I do understand how I don't want my child around "bad" influences. With that said, I think your friend is in a for REAL SHOCKER!!! Her child is going to throw a tantrum one of these days, and she'll won't know what hit her.

    Honestly a tantrum is going to's a part of childhood, I would NOT keep my child away because of it. 


    Answer by SAHMinIL at 6:41 PM on Jul. 16, 2008

  • wow thats crazy she must be a first time mom with no prior experience with kids i would have been super offended in fact i know exactly how you feel my friend is kinda the same way but its her and her kids that i dont want my kid near but they hit and she yells

    Answer by mcwilsonsmom210 at 8:05 PM on Jul. 16, 2008

  • I think it's hurtful and absurd too. What's really sad is I think she will blame you when her "little angel" suddenly discovers she has a will and mind of her own.
    I don't know what to tell you to do besides letting her remove her son. If she is a good friend, you can call her up and tell her that her comment was hurtful. Remind her that tantrums are part of toddlerhood and that it will not be your fault when her toddler enters that phase - just as it won't be her fault if your older child mimics the bad behavior a year from now. If she's not that good a friend, she will blame you when her child throws his first fit and you need to decide how you will handle that.

    Answer by kaycee14 at 8:25 PM on Jul. 16, 2008

  • WOW! I sure would like to be a fly on the wall when her son has that "first" temper tantrum. Can't blame others for what is naturally going to happen. I think she should hang around and observe how positive you handle the tantrum and use the same method(s) when her sweet baby starts throwing his! This is kinda funny because we all don't want a child that misbehaves, but in reality...they all do! Hey, sometimes adults throw those two year old fits!

    Answer by ladyoprayer2 at 9:57 PM on Jul. 16, 2008

  • i think you should go pop some pop corn and wati for the day that she is eating those words. lol. don't spit in the air, cause its gonna come back down and hit you in the face. that's all i'm saying.

    Answer by princezzmommie at 10:09 PM on Jul. 16, 2008

  • My son just started biting and he is in a daycare with 6 older kids and they all rough house so I feel like I need to pull him out but as a single mom I have no where else I can afford. When he throws a tantrum the only thing that works for him is making him stand on the bathroom sink and scaring him by screaming at him. I know it sounds mean but it actually works he is a nice boy after that. I hope that this will help you out. Your friend is a real jerk for saying those things to you. I would just take it with a grain of salt though because she will find out soon enough what it is like to have a terrible twoer in the house. Good luck.

    Answer by p_frabotta at 10:26 PM on Jul. 16, 2008

  • i told her that i was sorry if my child contaminated her child but that tantrums were bound to happen whether they were viewed or not because it's an internal emotional developmental process. I told her how hurt and angry I was about it. I also said well what if i pulled my child away from your son whenever he whines? I tried to put it into perspective for her but she retaliated with "i have my own parenting style and you should not judge it and you should respect it." Then she went on to tell me that using the word "contaminate" was hostile and that I was a mean person for telling her how upset I was and then she dumped me - over email.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:40 PM on Jul. 16, 2008