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He get's father of the year hands down, but he sucks as a man...???

The father of three out of my four, is positively wonderful with the children. In fact if I want to enjoy an evening without children, I'm the bad guy. How dare I not want them around at all times? According to him it's a woman thing, the way we can detatch ourselves from our offspring. He's not willing to let them out of his sight, even for one romantic evening. I'm ready to step off on my own...any suggestions?

 
Dmommy4

Asked by Dmommy4 at 12:42 AM on Jan. 8, 2009 in Relationships

Level 9 (315 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • In Europe women are respected in a whole different way. It is not looked dwn upon if mom wants time to herself, or with hubby. It's actually expected! After all, we do most everything for the kids. so we deserve down time!! In the US women are looked down on if they want time away. Or your thought of as a bad mom etc. Your expected to take care of the kids and all that that entails, clean, cook, appointments, pets, groceries, etc etc etc. and if you want to go see a movie or dinner without them you're bad!!! Not so!!! I love my son more than anything but it's nice to have time with my husband or just me, and that's okay. If he won't go, you wont need to call a sitter!! Go alone or with girlfriends and enjoy yourself and DONT let him guilt trip you into staying home.
    GMR

    Answer by GMR at 12:29 PM on Jan. 8, 2009

  • Well, Hon, most women on here would be very envious of you. I think you should take him, a good family man and all. You'll have plenty of time to yourself when the kids grow up.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:44 AM on Jan. 8, 2009

  • So what about him sucks? Is it that he just always wants to be with the kids? Is he mean to you in anyway, he is lazy and out of work?
    Magpie75

    Answer by Magpie75 at 12:57 AM on Jan. 8, 2009

  • Everyone needs time away from the kids even if it's a short period. It amazes me that he doesn't want to spend time alone with you. I'm sure you've sat down with him and talked to him, maybe it's time to insist on having time to yourselves.
    momiwant1

    Answer by momiwant1 at 1:04 AM on Jan. 8, 2009

  • Not everyone wants or needs to be away from their children. Appreciate him.
    Chrissy629

    Answer by Chrissy629 at 6:55 AM on Jan. 8, 2009

  • i dont think its a "women thing" far more men are able to do this then women and by all means a night away doesnt mean you are "detaching" from them we still think about them wonder if they are ok or if they are being good or if they cried at all and so on. do you sty home with kids while he works? he may feel you are lucky to get to be there with them all the time maybe itss time to ask granma if she will ask for the kids for a sleep over because she wants to spend time with them, he cant deny grandma that time with her grandkids. also what was his childhood like, maybe he is over compensating for his father never being there or he is mimicking his father always being there you may have to look a little deeper for your answer
    mommie2twogirls

    Answer by mommie2twogirls at 10:01 AM on Jan. 8, 2009

  • Oh yeah, you should just dump him and move on. Let someone who would appreciate him have him. I'm sure you'll be able to find a man that wants nothing more than pawn your children off whenever you can to go out.

    A little bit harsh, I know. But come on! There are seriously worse things that could be going on here than a man wanting to spend all his time with his children.
    munch12502

    Answer by munch12502 at 11:18 PM on Jan. 8, 2009

  • Well, munch12502, I won't react harshly , since I know you have no clue. My man doesn't work right now because I broke my ankle a mths ago, and still not back on my feet yet. But before this I was doing ALL the things he's stepped up to do now. Don't get me wrong, he's found a new appreciation for his children, and realized how much he was missing. Good for him, but he filled my shoes because he HAD to, not out of the kindness of his heart. I'm a bedtm story, cookie baking, tea drinking, alien hunting, term paper editing, Sunday dinner cooking, Football loving (GO EAGLES!), fightnight hosting, popcorn popping, beer drinking MOMMA. I DESERVE some TIME to myself. It's not what you do, it's how you do it, and I've figured out a way to get what I want, and still give him what he needs at the same time. YOU on the other hand, should try not to be so immediately judgemental of people. Is your baby daddy MIA or something?
    Dmommy4

    Answer by Dmommy4 at 7:27 PM on Jan. 11, 2009