Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

how do I get my step son to stop talking back and lashing out without yelling at him all day?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:09 AM on Jan. 8, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

Answers (6)
  • "how do I get my step son to stop talking back and lashing out without yelling at him all day" There you have it! If you are yelling at him he will yell at you!
    Paty_hotmommy

    Answer by Paty_hotmommy at 6:12 AM on Jan. 8, 2009

  • I am a mom of 6 kids and have been a step child 5 x's [ mom couldnt commite..lol] and I will tell you the best advice that I ever got from theropy and that is to talk to him away from the house and everyone else. tell him that you know your not his mom and that you are not trying to replace her in his life explain to him that you love his father very much and that you love him too because he came from the man you love. ASK him what am I doing that is hurting yo so much that you want me to hurt too? what can we do together to make this better? ans i'd watch stepmom with julia roberts together to help too
    kelticme

    Answer by kelticme at 6:35 AM on Jan. 8, 2009

  • not going to happen i have a step son and he is an ass. his dad and i got together when he was like five. and he was a brat then. calling me names, yelling, lying to his dad about me telling him i hit him or threw something at him just to start fights. well now he is eighteen only comes around when he wants money from his dad has no job refuses to get a job and lives with his grandmother. but when he comes around if he sees an oppurtunity to cause problems he will.
    jodi205

    Answer by jodi205 at 7:05 AM on Jan. 8, 2009

  • oh and to the first poster. you said if she is yelling at him he's going to yell back. first of all he has no right to yell back he is the child,but in my situation it didn't matter time an time again i tried to be nice to this boy and he would be nice to my face and then turn around five minutes later and tell his dad i called him a name or something. and if i tried to talk to him decently he still yelled an acted like an ass. to this day i can't stand to hear his name
    jodi205

    Answer by jodi205 at 7:09 AM on Jan. 8, 2009

  • How old is your step son? Where does your husband fit into all this? You will need to work together on this. Someone suggested taking him away from the house and talking with him. Thats a good idea. Family counseling may be in order too. I finally told my stepson that I had enough. He wasnt going to disrespt me anymore in my home and like it or not this was my home too. I was here to stay and we could either figure out how to get along or it was going to be pretty uncomfortable for everyone. He was a teenager when I married his father and lived there at the house. I totally messed his world up when I came along lol. Dont back down. Demand respect, but in return you have to respect him too.
    mistynights234

    Answer by mistynights234 at 7:39 AM on Jan. 8, 2009

  • Have you read the book How to Behave so your Child will too? I know he is a bit older and your stepchild, but the book has some great tips on keeping your cool. He is there to push your buttons and make things uncomfortable, the book will help YOU stay happier. Just a suggestion :)
    KnoxvilleDoula

    Answer by KnoxvilleDoula at 9:30 AM on Jan. 8, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.