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Question for divorced/remarried Moms

In the summer my ex has 6 weeks of time with our boys. They are 5 and 6. Do you think a whole block of time away from me is ok? Last year it was 4 weeks in June and 2 weeks in July. It didn't seem like it bothered them, they had fun and I spoke to them on the phone about twice a week.We are planning on the same this year. Let me know what you think.

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Asked by cheryl4martin at 3:59 PM on Jan. 9, 2009 in General Parenting

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Answers (9)
  • I think its fine. If your ex isnt abusive and is an attentive father then as much time with the absent parent is always beneficial. Let me ask you this to put it in perspective. If the shoe was on the other foot would it be a problem>?

    Answer by gemgem at 4:00 PM on Jan. 9, 2009

  • So long as they are taken care of, it is good for them to learn to be with their dad and away from you. Teaches them how to adjust to other people. And they need that relationship with their dad.

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 4:03 PM on Jan. 9, 2009

  • No, he's good to them, very attentive..I guess I worry because he lives in a bad area and he smokes a lot... He lives with his Mother and she smokes as well... I know they love them a lot but I guess being Mom I worry A LOT,LOL.....

    Answer by cheryl4martin at 4:03 PM on Jan. 9, 2009

  • And that is totally normal. Plus were moms we dont want to be away from them. Its human nature. Try sending a letter to your ex or talking to him about the smoking. Sometimes just bringing it to their attn is all they need.

    Answer by gemgem at 4:05 PM on Jan. 9, 2009

  • My children's father takes the kids every summer, all summer and has since the youngest was two. I enjoy my "me" time. I get to play and have fun myself. And father and children get to have bonding time. It is beneficial to all involved. The kids need to know that dad loves them , he needs to prove to himself he is a good father, and you need a break once in a while.

    Answer by MomShawn70 at 4:14 PM on Jan. 9, 2009

  • They are with their dad and probably love the time with him. They probably could use more time with him. I feel bad for kids who cannot split their time evenly between mom and dad. Imagine how you ex feels not having them for days at a time. My step mom and her husband shared custody of their girls. They loved it they did not have to choose and got to spend all the time they wanted with mom and dad. The kids are well adjusted adults who did not have to worry about mom or dad being sad when they did not seem them for a couple weeks.


    Answer by Anonymous at 4:19 PM on Jan. 9, 2009

  • Their dad has just as much right to spend time with them and they have just as much right to spend time with their dad. You just have to get over yourself and your feelings about it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:16 PM on Jan. 9, 2009

  • my childrens dad live in a bad area and he smokes cigarettes too ,i'm sure he worries and wonders about his children just as much as you do also if he is a good dad .Fathers are more worried ive heard than mothers in many cases when it pertains to children. We usually let the children spend the entire summer with my ex husband and it seems to work out great for us and the kids we have 3 sons and boys usually idolize the dad and want to grow up just like daddy and it a great thing if he's attentive and carring for them

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:16 AM on Jan. 10, 2009

  • Theres bad places all over,get over it .Loosen the apron strings and let them go with dad!boys need to be with the dad as much as possible.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:18 AM on Jan. 10, 2009

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