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I cant handle the put downs what would you do ?

what should i do my boyfriend is always putting me down and he turns around and tells me everything is my fault that he is the one who is hurt and to stop focusing on myself and my feelings... so confused i don't understand all i know that it is at the point where it can break us apart for good has anyone else gone through this please help..

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:53 PM on Jan. 10, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • IMHO this does not sound like a healthy relationship and since he's only a boyfriend and not husband, my advice is to say goodbye.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:56 PM on Jan. 10, 2009

  • You don't need to be with someone who treats you like that, it takes two to make a relationship work and if he loved you he wouldn't be putting you down all the time.
    sammiesmom2000

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 6:03 PM on Jan. 10, 2009

  • What I would do would be to tell him that he's right, it's all my fault... I don't deserve you so I'm letting you go (with sarcasm) and wave goodbye as I walked away.
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 6:04 PM on Jan. 10, 2009

  • It takes two to tango. If you want this relationship to work, take a good look at yourself and see if there is even the tiniest bit of truth to some of the things he says. If there is acknowledge it to him and work on them. If you are doing all you can already, then you don't deserve to be treated like that. Well actually no one deserves to be treated like that wether it's true or not. So my opinion is move on with your life and find someone who will treat you like a queen and you can treat like a king.
    avpriddis

    Answer by avpriddis at 6:32 PM on Jan. 10, 2009

  • get out
    mommie2twogirls

    Answer by mommie2twogirls at 7:28 PM on Jan. 10, 2009

  • listen mama, your situation is exactly like mine. everyone says "leave, leave" but you and i both know it's not that easy.i wish i had an answer but all i have is support. my husband has started doing all that and when he hits me "it's my fault" and when he cheats on me "it's my fault"...

    what is starting to help me out is i am going to online school at home (because he's controling as well). that gives me a new focus and not to mention when you get wrapped up in it, you start feeling better about yourself and lay ground work to not be dependent on him.

    i wont bull$#!+ you, i know you cant just grab your pillow and walk out, but listen mama, you need a new focus and branch out.
    romika

    Answer by romika at 10:00 PM on Jan. 10, 2009

  • I went through a similar situation and it nearly destroyed me. I tried everything to change. I left him and never regretted my decision. Your relationship with this guy is dangerous and abusive. Leave him.,
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:50 PM on Jan. 10, 2009

  • I forgot to add that my ex eventually married and I heard through a mutual friend that he started beating her and put her in the hospital more than once. My emotional pain was difficult but nothing compared to what her physcal and psychological pain must have been. Get out while you are still single, if you marry it will get even worse.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:56 PM on Jan. 10, 2009

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