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my husband has been treating me very poorly....he yells and screams at me like a child ..what do i do im so sick of crying

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:36 AM on Jul. 17, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • Crying in response is childlike. I've done it. Begin to establish your self worth, so that you will see his abuse for what it is, rather than something that makes you cry as if you deserve it. You may require some outside counselling. I'd talk with you if you would like, however I'm just another mom. I wish you well in finding your worth, and in finding your voice.
    MomShap

    Answer by MomShap at 9:39 AM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • It is sad to say that I lived for 8 years dealing with a husband with similar ways.  There wasn't always yelling involved, but he talked down to me and treated me as a child.  We ended up splitting up, and that is when I realized that our "Marriage" was LONG gone.  I realized quickly, that he was NOT going to walk all over me again.  He would get all riled up about this matter or that matter and I just remained cool, calm, and collected.  I know that it infuriated him that he couldn't break me down to tears anymore, but I felt better about myself.  It eventually gets old and boring and the fire behind his ways kind of burns out a little.  I am proud and happy to say that my divorce was finalized this past Monday.   
    Mommaniffer

    Answer by Mommaniffer at 9:51 AM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • You know he is like that and wont change so you have to change how you receive his words. In the book, The Four Agreements it says first and foremost we should not take anything personally. So don't take it personally when he shouts. His mean words are HIS issue. It's a reflection of what he feels about HIMSELF not YOU. In Deepak Chopra's book he says we are offended by words because we CHOOSE to allow them to hurt/offend us. Find a way to let them slide off your back. They are words. yes they hurt but they have no meaning unless you allow it. Your h is a bully. He does it to get a response out of you. Stop letting him get away with that. It might take practice but don't cry in front of him. Walk away and cry later if you want. Take away his joy in making you feel bad. Ignore his bad behavior like he was a bad boy.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:40 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • It's like the old saying "never let'em see you sweat". You are not to blame for his infantile behavior so ignore him when he throws a temper tantrum. He isn't your father he is your husband your equal!!!
    Tawanda74

    Answer by Tawanda74 at 1:25 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • First you need to stop crying. Then stand up and defend yourself against this "bully" that is your husband. Demand respect and move on if he isn't willing to provide you with the respect and unconditional love that comes with being in a relationship.
    bramlettljb

    Answer by bramlettljb at 1:29 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

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