Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How much time do you spend??

I'm just curious to see how much time you actually spend 1 on1 with your toddler? My son will be 3 in March, and I've started having him play in his room at times (mostly to give me a breather) but I don't do it often. But still, when I do, I feel terrible! And he never wants to stay in there! lol I know he's at an age where he strives for attention, and I give him TONS! But I've seen some people who barely interact with their children at all! With all the speculation these days about whether or not we're being "super mom" or even a good mom for that matter just make me wonder.. and I over doing it and he's going to be clingy, or am I not spending enough time?

 
BeckNAiden06

Asked by BeckNAiden06 at 12:28 AM on Jan. 11, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • Honestly, I couldn't spend more time with him.  I think encouraging some independence with an almost three-year-old is great, and not anything to feel terrible about.  If he is resistent, try including him as your "helper" and he'll either really enjoy it or one day say "Umm, Mom, I think I'd rather play in my room than help you fold laundry."  LOL!  I smothered my oldest son with 24/7 love and attention.  Everyone said he was too attached.  Well, the result was the most confident, self-assured, independent young man, and I got endless comments about that after he was about four years old.  It sounds to me like you're doing awesome.  Here's what our days look like ..... continued ......

    FreeHomeBiz

    Answer by FreeHomeBiz at 12:43 AM on Jan. 11, 2009

  • I think that the alone time in his room is good for him, it will help him break the dependancy he has on you so that as he gets older it will be easier to go to kindergarten or pre k without having issues of clinging to you. You don't have to spend 100% of your day around your child you can still be a good mom if you seek 30 mins to an hour to have some breather times, breaks are allowed don't beat yourself up over it
    bubblycute

    Answer by bubblycute at 12:35 AM on Jan. 11, 2009

  • I am with my two-year-old son 24/7.  I get a break during his nap and after he goes to bed at 7 p.m. every night.  He plays very well on his own in the family room while I work on my laptop.  I work in 30-minute spurts and then stop to give him my full attention.  I make sure we spend time every day reading books, doing puzzles, blocks, Legos, coloring, Play Doh, and running around outside when the weather permits.  We eat all of our meals together and he also has my undivided attention when I give him a bath every day.  We have routines for nap and bedtime.  I include him in everything I do from loading the dishwasher, to cooking, to laundry.

    FreeHomeBiz

    Answer by FreeHomeBiz at 12:44 AM on Jan. 11, 2009

  • I dont think its a bad idea to have your child play in his /her room so u can have a breather,thats good for them sometimes so they can learn how to intertain themselves, it would probably make YOU feel better if you sat down with him & read a book together before sending him into his room, then when your finished w/ whatever you have to do you can go into his room & ask what he's been playing & join him for 5 min. or so..... Then you get some "me" time without feeling bad!!!!
    luvmybabies003

    Answer by luvmybabies003 at 12:45 AM on Jan. 11, 2009

  • My daughter turned 1 in Decemner. When I went back to work I beat myself up about not being there with her all day every day. I have slowly come to realize that I have to do what I have to do for her. I work full time so I don't get to spend as much time as I would like with her. I spend about 4 hours with her a day( except for weekends). Because it is not a lot of time I try to really make it count. I think that the quality far outweighs the quantity in this case. At least for me.
    Skylers1Mom

    Answer by Skylers1Mom at 1:08 AM on Jan. 11, 2009

  • I have three boys (ages 4, 3, and 2 years) so 1-on-1 time doesn't happen very often around here to be honest. We try..and there is some...but it's tough. The boys are fine.

    Don't worry about having him play by himself for a bit and taking some time to yourself. What about peers? Does he get to play with other kids at all? That's pretty important, too...
    TiccledBlue

    Answer by TiccledBlue at 7:02 AM on Jan. 11, 2009

  • Well i have five boys (5,3,2,17mo and 4mo) and i am a SAHM and i spend time with them all, reading to them, we sit down and learn our colours and numbers and we play games, my oldest learnt alot at a early age thanks to me helping him but he also has what they call a photographic memory which we found out just before his youngest brother was born.
    Mummytomore

    Answer by Mummytomore at 7:38 AM on Jan. 11, 2009

close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN