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What should I say?

My cousin's baby who was born 12 days after mine (they're both 5 months old) is in the hospital hooked up to oxygen. He had bronchitis and they think he had a seizure so they're doing brain scans. I feel so guilty that my son is perfectly healthy while hers is very sick and in the hospital. I wouldn't know what to do with myself if I were in that situation and had to watch my little baby like that. She lives on the other side of the country so we don't really talk on the phone, but we e-mail. I want to send her a message but I have no idea what to say? I feel like if I were her I wouldn't want to hear from me. What would you want to hear if you were in that situation?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:23 PM on Jan. 11, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • Yes I would. Just email her and tell her youre so sorry to hear about her son and that if there is anything at all you can do to let you know. I would also send her flowers.

    Answer by gemgem at 2:31 PM on Jan. 11, 2009

  • I would want to hear that you are thinking about me and my child and you are praying(if you 2 pray) that things will be ok.I would also want to know that you are there if I just need to talk.

    Answer by Kat122 at 2:40 PM on Jan. 11, 2009

  • It sounds like you are a very compassionate and caring person. I don't think you will say anything that is inappropriate or insensitive. So, I think you should definitely call her and express your concerns and sorrow and tell her that you will pray for all of them for a speedy recovery.

    Answer by hopelessnance at 2:43 PM on Jan. 11, 2009

  • Don't feel guilty about your healthy baby, at all. Enjoy and love him. Your cousin's baby is someone to be concerned about and to pray for. Let her know that you are worried and that you hope all is soon well. No point in bringing up your baby unless she does. She possibly realizes that you are worried how she'll be feeling toward you. Just express your concern and love for her and her baby and let it go until she gives you a lead from what she says or how she reacts. I'd call her. And send her a snail mail note assuring her that she and her baby are in your prayers (if this is your belief, of course.) A hand-written note is something to be cherished and re-read. Make if just from you (and husband, SO, etc) not from the baby, too, naturally.

    Answer by Bmat at 2:45 PM on Jan. 11, 2009

  • Just tell her you are thinking of her and if she wants to talk call.

    Answer by ckmomof2 at 4:17 PM on Jan. 11, 2009

  • Dont feel bad about your child its not your fault that her baby iis sick offer your "sholder" and your remorse for her baby and be there for her thats all you can do

    Answer by rachel_07 at 4:18 PM on Jan. 11, 2009

  • I have been there except it was my baby in the hospital and my brother has a baby a few months younger then mine i know for a fact she needs your support just let her know that your there if she ever needs you.

    Answer by aubrees_mommie at 7:14 PM on Jan. 11, 2009

  • Yes, tell her you think of her often, and that if she ever needs anything, to just ask. Sometimes its even more awkward for the one in the bad situation. You have to put yourself out there. Good luck. :)

    Answer by LovinMyMikayla at 7:36 PM on Jan. 11, 2009

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