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Worried about miscarriage/ Sux I can't tell people!

I'm only 6 weeks and I have to say, it sucks worrying about having a miscarriage. I can't stand having to wait until the first trimester ends to tell people! My Dh and I decided it's for the best, as our good friend got pregnant, told a bunch of people and then had a miscarriage. I don't want that to happen to me, but I hate not telling people and worrying about a miscarriage! How have you ladies dealt with it?

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Asked by Anonymous at 12:06 PM on Jul. 17, 2008 in Pregnancy

Answers (13)
  • I've had multiple miscarriages...the first time it happened, we had told EVERYONE I was pregnant. When I lost the baby, the outpouring of love and comfort was a HUGE help to me. Because people knew about my loss, they were a little more understanding than usual.

    The 2nd time, we told NOBODY I was pregnant. There was nearly as much understanding an encouragement from people when they found out.

    Years later, in a psychology class, I realized that because I had been excited about my pregnancy, people got excited with me, and felt a loss, even if small, when I miscarried.

    When I got pregnant with my youngest, I told EVERYONE!!! I'm so happy he survived.

    Answer by lawmom623 at 12:11 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • It's tough!
    Here's a trick that might help... put a big red circle around the first day of your second trimester on the calendar and mark off the days as you go. It will help when you see that special day getting closer and closer.

    Answer by kaycee14 at 12:12 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • I was always way too excited to wait to tell people. After two successful pregnancies and deliveries, my husband and I lost our third baby to an ectopic pregnancy and it was important that I had the support of my friends and family around me. It can be hard to have someone not in the know ask how the pregnancy is going when it's already ended, but it's bound to happen. I had my husband call all his family to tell them what was going on and I called my family. But like I said, it was very important for me to be able to speak about it and get the love and support I needed. *hugs*

    Answer by CreativeSpirit at 12:15 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • My first pregnancy ended in a miscarriage I would have had twins, Then I got pregnant with my daughter and I was worried sick every little twinge of anything was enough to stress me out I was so scared that it would end the same way my first pregnancy did. I stressed my way to my second trimester and thats when I told everybody I was expecting a girl. In that trimester I went to the hospital 3 times because she would stop moving and wouldn't move for a day luckily today she is an active 2 1/2 year old.

    Answer by emmasmommy1016 at 12:23 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • I am sorry you are worrying. I worried about miscarriage. But, my DH and I told EVERYONE the night we found out. We now have a healthy and beautiful baby girl! Oh...the worrying never really stopped for me :)
    Good luck. I hope you have a successful pregnancy and birth of a happy healthy baby!

    Answer by Gail2008 at 12:25 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • I told everyone. My first pregnancy ended at 14 weeks(twins), my second pregnancy resulted in a happy healthy little boy. I told everyone with him also. I was scared, but it helped having the encouragement. I felt like I wanted to tell people because if I did indeed miscarry, then I needed them to know why I had to be off work or be in the hospital. Ya know? I felt like I had a small army supporting me and helping me along the way

    Answer by trentntats at 12:47 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • You don't have to wait to tell people. I always hated the 2nd trimester rule. Why should I not enjoy the life of my child, and share that happiness with everyone?

    I lost a baby 4 months ago. We had already told everyone we were pregnant and ended up losing the baby at about 7 weeks. The amount of support was so amazing! I can't imagine suffering all alone without being able to tell people why I was upset.

    It's a personal choice. Do what you feel like is best for you. In my opinion, every child's life, no matter how short, should be celebrated not kept secret.

    Answer by purvislets at 1:54 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • I would tell people especially family, if you do have a miscarraige or in my case ectopic pregnancies, then they can help you get through it.

    Answer by LitningBug at 2:59 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • I am also 6 weeks pregnant and my SO and I decided at first to wait to tell everyone until the 2nd trimester but it was such exciting news we couldn't keep it to ourselves. I felt like I was living this secret life and it was eating at me....GOOD LUCK!!

    Answer by mom2twingrls07 at 4:08 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • I think you should go ahead and tell people. By not telling people you are just stressing upon yourself the fact that something could go wrong. Telling people you are pregnant wont cause a miscarraige, but fear is not healthy to a pregnancy! Pregnancy has been a natural thing since the beginnning of time and you should celebrate every second of it. The more you are celebrating it the less time you will have to worry about it!

    Answer by HadassasMommy at 4:11 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

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