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NEED ADViSE GiRLS...

Hi everyone.
Here is my situation, I have been dating a famous rapper for the last few months.
He knows I'm not dating him for who he is or what he can give me becasue I work and I have never asked him for anything. He has asked me many times to quit my job and to move in with him but I think is way to soon. Im a very jealous person and the whole groupies thing drives me crazy!
I hate looking at his myspace page and reading all this girls leaving him all this comments! I hate him going out of town for shows. I hate being home thinking what is he doing after the show? Who is he with? I just dont know how to deal with all this but I dont want to let him go. I love him! Not the rapper but the real him!
I would very much appreciate yall's advise =]

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:50 AM on Jan. 12, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • Regardless of who you are dating, there HAS to be a solid foundation of TRUST and COMMUNICATION. If your man fails to meet those two key objectives, then he is not the man for you. If he makes time for you and is tuned in to you 100%, and makes you feel loved and special, then great! If you are STILL jealous of the groupies, then you should really address your insecurities or this pattern is going to continue to repeat itself.
    LoriKeet

    Answer by LoriKeet at 8:54 AM on Jan. 12, 2009

  • Well if hes famous you knew that when you met him. You either trust him or you dont. Asking yourself all those questions will only drive you insane. I wouldnt move in with him if you arent ready either. I would also work on jealousy issues and see where those come from. There are usually things in our past that makes us act out that way. Dealing with those issues will help not just with this relationship but every relationship in your life.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 8:54 AM on Jan. 12, 2009

  • First of all, weather he is a rapper or not, I trust my husband 100%. Even if he was gone from me for 10 years I trust him. No matter what some silly girl writes on myspace, he comes home to me and if you can't trust him, you don't need him. Also, you have to be mature enough to understand that he is reputable and alot of people look up to him and fantasize about him (Tom Cruise anyone? lol) If you don't want to quite your job and move in with him, then don't. (IMO, people should be married before they move in together, ESPECIALLY when there are kids involved) HOWEVER, don't complain that you want to spend more time with him when he's asking you to quite your job so you two can be closer. Hope everything works out the way you want.
    navy-wife

    Answer by navy-wife at 8:57 AM on Jan. 12, 2009

  • If you are that jealous and that possessive with him, then this relationship probably won't work. He will be in the spotlight and if it drives you crazy to see the girls all over him, then move on now before your heart gets really stepped on. Its not that he is being unfaithful, but its part of his life (good bad or otherwise) and you will drive yourself crazy wondering about it. Good luck.
    momofsaee

    Answer by momofsaee at 9:05 AM on Jan. 12, 2009

  • If the women on myspace bother you, the idea of groupies bother you, then you're headed for life of misery if you stay with him because the media makes things up when they can't find anything, lots hook ups, love nests, love children etc that really aren't, are publisized all over the tabloids just to get readers... good luck in whatever you decide to do.
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 9:14 AM on Jan. 12, 2009

  • You gotta take the good with the bad. All the girls and attention comes along with the fame. If you don't like it then you are in the wrong relationship. You can't expect him to quit rapping just because of your jealousy. If you act jealous and like you don't trust him all you are going to do is push him away. This is more about you than about him. If you can't handle what comes with the fame then you need to be the one making changes. Not him.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:22 AM on Jan. 12, 2009

  • This situation is really different because most people don't have numerous women throwing themselves at them.....and the travel, etc. Not everyone lives like that and not everyone can deal with it. It is complicated in all its own way. You are not crazy to feel "at risk" and jealous, but those feelings aren't good for the relationship either.... I am sympathizing with you, but I don't know what advice to give you. I guess you do have to figure out whether you can deal with this whole package or not.
    BJoan

    Answer by BJoan at 10:50 AM on Jan. 12, 2009

  • But the rapper is apart of the real him. Do you start arguments with him or give him grief about where he's been? If so, then maybe this isn't the relationship for you but if you can look past some of your feelings and calm yourself down right when those ideas start to pop up, then you should be okay. Hang in there.
    k.alexander

    Answer by k.alexander at 4:31 PM on Jan. 12, 2009

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