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3 Bumps

Husband afraid of his mother

Im not sure but I begin to think that my husband is afraid of his mother. When we first moved in together(into his house, prior to this we lived in my apt) his mom also lived with him. But it didn't appear this way.

HE OWNS THE HOUSE PAYS THE MORTGAGE EVERYTHING BILLS

1. She physically owns the house(WITH HER THINGS AND THE WAY SH E ACTS) in other words she decorates it, occupies it, does all the holiday dinners and regular dinners without even thinking she should ask.

2.She had 2 out of 4 bedrooms, one being the master while my husband, I and our newborn had a rather much smaller room and my clothes were stored on the floor. This did not bother him-at all.

3. His brother would freely move people in going through his mother and (of course) she okayed it so everyone ignored my husband or his say so.

4. When I moved in he had to 'tell' his mother before I could move in. Not call or let her know when I'm there, none of that.

5. When he has company at night they have to be quiet because she was sleeping, no one could even ring the doorbell.

6. She moved out and left her furniture and put locks on the bedrooms and certain doors, he didn't dare touch her tv (which was actually a gift she gave to her ex husband but took back when he divorced her) in the living room, go in the rooms (that ended up having molded food in it etc.) or even use the xmas tree that he actually paid for.


7. She moved out a year ago but didn't take her furniture (which I knew why) he never boxed it up and put it in storage and now a year later, she's moving back in. No questions asked because she threatened to sue him because technically she never left.

8. She blackmails him with the vehicle thats in her name, has disconnected the electricity(he refused to ask her to disconnect utilities so we could get them in our name)

9. The year that she was gone she kept cable services at our house (which we could not use because she locked it up in her room) so for a year we had no cable, internet, or phone (except cellphone)

He says this is respect, I feel its fear. I sit back and watch ssilently and no I don't treat him in this way. I just want to know (for myself what do other people think. I've signed him up for therapy.

Answer Question
 
thelovelymzbre

Asked by thelovelymzbre at 5:24 PM on Dec. 27, 2011 in Relationships

Level 13 (1,326 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • and you didn't find any of this behavior odd before marrying them??

    wow. i'm not sure who needs the therapy most. i certainly wouldn't be part of this arrangement, marriage or no marriage. i'd be gone!
    dullscissors

    Answer by dullscissors at 5:27 PM on Dec. 27, 2011

  • Her house. Her rules. Why dont you move out and get your own place? It is a sign of respect he is a grown man living with his family in his moms house.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 5:27 PM on Dec. 27, 2011

  • So who ACTUALLY owns the house?
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 5:27 PM on Dec. 27, 2011

  • lol he owns the house she physically appears to own the house with her things and behavior
    thelovelymzbre

    Comment by thelovelymzbre (original poster) at 5:31 PM on Dec. 27, 2011

  • So the house is in his name? Or does he just pay the bills? I am confused.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 5:34 PM on Dec. 27, 2011

  • the house is in his name he pays the bills everything in the house is in his name
    thelovelymzbre

    Comment by thelovelymzbre (original poster) at 5:36 PM on Dec. 27, 2011

  • Then kick her ass out.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 5:37 PM on Dec. 27, 2011

  • I second that. get an eviction notice and give her the heave ho!
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 5:40 PM on Dec. 27, 2011

  • He needs to tell mom that things have changed.
    meooma

    Answer by meooma at 5:45 PM on Dec. 27, 2011

  • How many times do you need to ask this question before you just tell him to not let her in or you'll leave?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:16 PM on Dec. 27, 2011

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