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NOt sure help

Okay here goes, I found this guy on a dating site and have been talking to him on the phone. I know all about online dating and how dangerous it is. I have been talking to him for a little while and he seems sweet.. I have seen the picture that he had on his profile and asked for others as well. I did do a background check on him and all that he told me has panned out He doesnt know too much about me. He says that he likes me a lot. I asked him how could that be since we have not met he doesnt really know me. I think that he is sincere and all. He does make me laugh. He is another state but travels for work. He will be this way next month. should I meet him? Also before I met him and was talking to him I met up with an old bf and we hooked up. THe old bf though says he is not looking for anything serious and is not sure what he wants. Should I wait for the old flame or persue the new.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:33 PM on Jan. 12, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • Don't wait for the old one since he already said he is not looking for anything serious and does not know what he wants. You'd be wasting your time.

    If you want to meet the new guy, do a lunch meet or something is a very public, very safe location, and tell someone else where you are going, and who with, so that if anything happens they will have some idea of who to turn to.

    Answer by CarolynBarnett at 10:36 PM on Jan. 12, 2009

  • i agree with the poster above me

    Answer by aliciatron at 10:41 PM on Jan. 12, 2009

  • Why wait for an old flame...? You already know what he's about and he's an old flame for a reason, just keep it moving. If you feel a little connection with this guy you met online by all means meet up with him if your comfortable and yes meet in a public place. Alot of people are so quick to put down meeting people online because yes there are crazy people but there are crazy people walking down the street everyday. There are sane people online like yourself and normal people log on everyday looking for someone so good look and be safe.

    Answer by kira25 at 10:42 PM on Jan. 12, 2009

  • yeah what carolyn said or if you are uncomfortable seeing him alone have a friend come along.

    Answer by ednakrabapple at 10:42 PM on Jan. 12, 2009

  • I would meet him, just be smart. Meet him in a public place, and if you leave there, have him follow you in his own car. Don't be alone with him until you are sure you feel safe with him. Trust your gut! If you feel threatened or see any red flags, call it off. Do not let him have your address yet. These are all the things that I did when I met a guy on-line over nine years ago. Sept. 2, we celebrated our 8th wedding anniversary!wink  GOOD LUCK!


    Answer by Mishelly728 at 10:42 PM on Jan. 12, 2009

  • I agree with Carolyn. The old flame can be a buddy, but don't count on having future with him. If you'd like to meet the new guy meet him in the public place, don't give him your address or phone number (he can get your address from that), make sure someone else knows where you are and so forth. If you have a good friend who can do it, it might be safest to have the friend in the place also, anonymously, just to keep an eye on things. Your best bet would be to find someone locally, someone that you meet in a club or class or church that you actually can observe and talk with face to face before getting hopes up. Good idea to do a background check to make sure he is not married at least.

    Answer by Bmat at 10:43 PM on Jan. 12, 2009

  • Meet the new guy but in a public place like the above poster says but also don't give any up either cause he could just be looking for some ass if he travles alot. He could have a girl everywhere he goes.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:45 PM on Jan. 12, 2009

  • I think you should go on a date with online guy. Meet in a public place. At any rate, you have developed a rapport. There is no harm in meeting him face to face. See what he's about. The face to face meeting changes everything. You may just end up as friends. You should also go out with the old BF and see where that might lead. You are not committed to either one. Just be careful with your heart with BOTH. The old boyfriend has already said he doesn't want anything serious. Remember that statement! Don't forget he said that. Don't cloud yourself to thinking he'll change his mind.

    Answer by hopelessnance at 11:13 PM on Jan. 12, 2009

  • Don't settle for either one. Just enjoy time with them (and other men) before you make a decision to commit. Make sure you meet the online guy in a public place and don't let him know where you live. There is no law that says you have to choose a man now.

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:51 PM on Jan. 12, 2009

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