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How to find a way to co-exist with cheer-moms

Here is my question my 7 yr old is on a travel team and some of the mothers are really over the hill about this and they think there child is just all kinds of great. While where new to this out fit and my daughter because of how small she is the gave the flyer job to her and this has bread hate in the club and the parents and i just try to encourage my child but the have come to calling her the watermelon and i not too happy with this name. My child said it's because she like's watermelon,( and i think differently about this but am i over reacting to all this) because i don't fit in with the other mothers and my child has no problem with this name.

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Asked by suzieb911 at 12:24 AM on Jan. 13, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (10)
  • Watermelon is odd - never heard of that as a cheer term.

    Have you spoken to the coach?


    Answer by Wimsey at 1:27 AM on Jan. 13, 2009

  • I agree that's a weird name to be calling her. If anyone got bitchy with me I would just tell them to shut the hell up and to stop being petty.

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 8:00 AM on Jan. 13, 2009

  • I think that right now if she is having fun and she likes it then you should try and stick it out. I understand how heartbreaking it can be when you see your child getting picked on and not even realizing that is what happens.

    I would talk to the coach and see what they say. Make sure you talk to your daughter first because in talking to the coach you could make things worse.

    As far as the other parents are concerned I would ignore them unless they come and try to talk to you. I remember being in a situation like this with swimming and we just totally ignored the other parents. I think that the parents get jealous and do not know how to behave properly.

    So I guess if I were you I would keep an eye on things and talk to you daughter often.

    Good Luck

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 9:53 AM on Jan. 13, 2009

  • Hate is a pretty big word, and your post is not clear. I can see jealously, but like in any area, you get what you put in--be nice, chat, talk, and see what happens. Maybe the other moms are jealous, but you can only work on your own behaviors and reactions. If you child enjoys the sport, then keep her in. I don't know if watermelon is meant to me mean, funny, or cute, but talk to the coach.


    Answer by Teachermom01 at 10:47 AM on Jan. 13, 2009

  • stay neutral, by the end of it you'll be glad. these are the reasons we only did 1 yr of cheer.

    Answer by KARRIEMARIE at 11:05 AM on Jan. 13, 2009

  • I get it. Watermelon means that she is easy to cradle when they catch her. Everyone loves a flyer-they have fun with her typically and she usually fits in great-there is that mutual trust that connects them-ya know? But i do know what you mean about other moms. Some of them are clicky and even if you were to go up, talk, and try to be chummy-they'd be nice, but if they are a true click, they won't really include you. All the girls want to be the flyer-even if they are too big for the job-and the parents know this and want this too. So, there is jealousy towards you i'm sure. They'll get over it. Outsiders already know how they are-you are the normal one. In sports, the parents are the true competitors--with each others kids-ya know?

    Answer by hw1977 at 11:20 AM on Jan. 13, 2009

  • Yikes, the whole scene sounds really messed up. She is 7 years old? Why not have her in some less drama-filled activity, like soccer, basketball, art or music lessons? I will never encourage my daughter (now 8) to participate in cheerleading, because I believe it is primarily about posing and looking good, which are not values I wish to instill. Besides, being the "flyer" sounds really dangerous. Sorry to be a spoil-sport, but that is my opinion.

    Answer by yarnjunkie at 11:52 AM on Jan. 13, 2009

  • Ok I had to call a friend on this and ask her why the term watermelon would be used for a flier (her daughter does cheer, mine do competitive dance). She had no idea and had never heard it before. So I have a question for you. Did you have you daughter join cheer leading so she could make more friends or so you could find new adults to talk to? It sounds like your daughter is having fun and isn't having any problems with the girls on the squad. Talk to your daughter and make sure she knows that she can talk to you if something upsets her. and well let the other moms deal with their jealousy if that's what it is, cause yes most moms do want to see their daughter as the flier because it means the attention is focused on them, and admit it all of us want the world to see our little princess the way we do.

    Answer by xmasbaby73 at 3:10 PM on Jan. 13, 2009

  • My daughter is a cheerleader and loves it. I never was a cheerleader, I played sports. I notice that the Moms are obsessed with having their daugther's as fliers. This past season was my first encounter with this type of sport. Insecure women, in any situation, are caddy and feel better about themselves by talking about those that threaten them. ie. being nice, being prettier, thinner, have their child be better than theirs, etc. This list goes on. I would ask the coach to help you on the Watermelon comment, and get to the reason for it. Excpet nothing but the truth. This coach should be made aware of the feelings you have and she should not tolerate any form of bullying. It is her job. (if this is what is happening) This subject should never be discussed in front of your child.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:11 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • This is our first year cheering also. We love it. My daughters enjoy it because it is gymnastics and dance all in one. Maybe looking for a different group would be a better fit for you. Remember to shop around a bit to find the group that works the best for you and your daughter. I admit the flyer position is a sought after position. Alot of moms are nice, it sounds like you might have met some catty ones though.
    p.s. what group are you with?

    Answer by Jules1018 at 7:57 PM on Jan. 2, 2010

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