Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

is it ok????

i'm marred. but is it ok to just look as long thats as far as it goes
please help!!

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:35 PM on Jul. 17, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • I don't think so. I'm sure you will get plenty of other differing answers. But mine is biblically based. I do not think it's ok to look.
    feesharose

    Answer by feesharose at 3:38 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • Yes, as long as it's done tactfully. Obviously, don't go drooling at someone when the hubby is with you, but honestly, all humans look. Commenting on a cute guy when you're out shopping with the girls is fine, but just remember: you can browse the menu, just don't order the entree!!
    chelli509

    Answer by chelli509 at 3:41 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • I think it is completely natural that we are drawn to look at the opposite sex. Are you just looking at a good looking person, or looking for something better? If it is the later then you probably shouldn't look. The grass is always greener.
    Jazak

    Answer by Jazak at 3:42 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • Would you like it if you knew your husband was "just looking?"
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:43 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • No, it's not. How would you feel if your man went and looked at other women? But, to each their own I guess. I know I'm happy in my relationship, and I don't need to seek interest in anyone else.
    DementedPsyche

    Answer by DementedPsyche at 4:20 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • I know that my husband loves me. I would not fault him for noticing another beautiful woman. We often talk about people that we think are beautiful, what we like and what we don't like. I know that my DH is head over heals inlove with me, I know I have nothing to worry about.

    Can you honestly tell me that you do not notice a good looking man? I do not look for them, but I can recognize one when I see one. And there is enough trust in my relationship that I can tell DH about it.
    Jazak

    Answer by Jazak at 5:10 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • Sometimes when ppl ask if it's "okay to look', they really mean something else. At times they really mean, spend time with, be around, talk with or perhaps even plan a coffee/lunch date with them. I have even seen ppl use "playdates" for the children, as a way to get more interaction with the parent.
    They make comments like "nothing is going on between us", "he knows I'm married", "the kids were with us", or "is it a sin to look?".
    I don't think that a grey area at all, I think it's clearly dead wrong. How often do situations like that turn into affairs that "just happened"? Even if things don't go that way, clearly it's disrespectful to a marriage relationship.
    It seems all to often people try to justify what they know to be inappropriate actions.
    I believe that each of us, in our hearts - know what is right at any given moment.
    ChattyWifePlus2

    Answer by ChattyWifePlus2 at 5:16 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • ok this is just my opinion. but i dont think its a good thing. My dh says its not a good thing all the time too. but there is a difference in noticing a beautiful person. I can say to my husband, "look how beautiful that woman/man is" not in an attraction way but a complementive way. checking guys out ended when i met my husband. i dont need more than him
    dearone07

    Answer by dearone07 at 9:46 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • Why are you looking if you aren't interested? Your husband should be one of your priorities. How would you think this makes him feel if he notices you noticing other guys? He wants your full attention as much as you want his.
    JuneL

    Answer by JuneL at 10:52 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

  • Personally, looking is okay in my book. Sex is something that is based on far more than looks. The hottest guy might throw himself at me, but unless the whole package is there, I'd never have sex with him. Looks are such a small percentage of what I'd consider before having sex with someone.
    Trinjo

    Answer by Trinjo at 2:03 AM on Jul. 19, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN