Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Should visitation be taken away?

Should a PARENT who owes more then $2000 and makes NO PAYMENTS on the child support owed have their visitation rights away?? What if they contact their child less then once a month?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:07 PM on Jan. 13, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (7)
  • depends on the reason why this parent doesnt pay the child support.

    if that parent doesnt have the money, then i would NOT take the visitation right away.

    and contacting a child.. depends on the age of the child.
    some parents feel bad, like really bad that they are just not able to afford the child support and because of the shame they will not contact them.


    Answer by m.robertson811 at 12:11 PM on Jan. 13, 2009

  • Vistitation has no bearing on child support. If there is court ordered visitation you cannot withold that because of non payment. IF support is court can go to the courts and file against him. The y can and will garnish his/her wages for it.

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 12:19 PM on Jan. 13, 2009

  • I would not make payment a condition on which my child's father must fullfill or not have a relationship with our child. I would encourage visits as much as possible. I would also seek out whatever assistance, if any, in my community that helps get back child support from fathers. Your child depends on you for their well being. When they get older he/she/they will know who supported them, who was there, who was not, ect...but I personally would not want my child to resent me for not allowing him the opportunity to know his other parent. And when your child is older he can ask himself/herself, "hey Dad, how come you were not able to pay my child support?" Sooner or later they have to answer to their children. Fun time Daddy only lasts for so long. After that it is time for the answers.

    Answer by frogdawg at 12:45 PM on Jan. 13, 2009

  • He is NOT paying for the right to see his child.
    He is paying so that he will have a roof over his head and food to eat. Take him to court if he is behind. Do you have visitation set up by the court> if he is not abiding by it, you will have to take it to court...again, I think you should try at all costs to maintain a relationship between the parent and the kid(s) it will hurt the kid(s) the most if they dont have a relationship matter whose fault it is

    Answer by sweet-a-kins at 12:46 PM on Jan. 13, 2009

  • Greeneyedgrandma is right. It's apples and oranges. you can't punish one for the lack of the other. Let the court hold him in contempt and lock him up. This is why it's important to have the State Prosecutor's involved in Child Support cases. It would be cheaper to pay you the back support than to pay for an attorney and pay bail to get out of jail and possibly miss a day or two of work. (tell him that) BTW, mine is $60,000.00 behind and when my kids see him they tell him what they think of him. LOL

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:49 PM on Jan. 13, 2009

  • While I agree that child support is not "paying for the right to see the child" I think that in most cases you should stop visitation. My rationale is this: If the parent in question is not paying child support, then how is that parent going to provide for the child properly during a visitation? Although I know some people take advantage of the support money, there are few valid excuses for not paying your support. I would do anything to make sure my child had what they need, even if it meant that I would go without. In order to be a parent, you need to provide for your child. If you aren't able or willing to shoulder responsibility, then you can't expect the other parent to let you reap the rewards and joys of having a child.

    Answer by ozarkgirl3 at 2:30 PM on Jan. 13, 2009

  • you cannot withhold visitation for nonpayment. That is using the child as a pawn and very wrong in my opinion. My son's dad did not pay till he was over a year old but I never said he couldn't see our son. If there is a visitation order you could be held in contempt for violating it. If you are not receiving support, go back to court and file papers to have them enforce it.

    Answer by heatherann0221 at 3:37 PM on Jan. 13, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.