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Parental Confidence

When and why do you suppose we lost confidence in ourselves as parents? Do you think that its because we are bombarded with magazines telling us how to raise our kids? The government? When I was growing up, the only book my mother ever read was Dr. Spock's. Do you think its the lack of religious faith? Or, is it because of worldly happenings?

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my4lads

Asked by my4lads at 2:56 PM on Jan. 13, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 2 (10 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • Idk! But the more I think of it... It seems like in general parenting is seen like a drain and a burden these days. "It's HARD work young ladies!" But if done right- it's rewarding and hard doesn't come close to the top of the list on describing it. I think women enter motherhood scared really. And then we are told to abandon and deny any natural instinct we have: Don't spoil the baby! Teach it to grow up! It's silly. I think we have lost confidence be yes, society is convincing us that our maternal instincts are: oppressive and holding us back from rewarding careers OR not comparable to "superior" scientific conclusions.

    CooksWife

    Answer by CooksWife at 3:01 PM on Jan. 13, 2009

  • Ya know I just do what works for us. Some things work some things don't and we make that alteration. I make it a point not to live up to anyone person expectation(s) except for my own. I am certainly aware of the fact that to some what I do is going to "break my childs spirit" or "not teach them how to (insert whatever here)" however, what works for us works for us. I believe in the old go with the gut philosophy....No two children are the same so it's impossible to follow a book..

    mamakirs

    Answer by mamakirs at 3:04 PM on Jan. 13, 2009

  • I think it's because somewhere down the line, over the years, somehow this idea of "the perfect parent" came into being. Too many strive to be this fictional character, this "perfect parent". There is no such thing and there never shall be.

    However...the media in it's infinite wisdom and infinite forms has convinced the women of today (and some men) that there is such a thing as the "perfect parent", thus creating the mess we see today.

    Parents no longer rely on their own instincts. They hear things on the media which contradict what their parents did...so the old ways must be wrong. Yes, things have changed in that doctors and specialists know things now they didn't know then...there have been new discoveries which in general have allowed more babies to survive infanthood growing into children and adults.

    TiccledBlue

    Answer by TiccledBlue at 3:04 PM on Jan. 13, 2009

  • But the media is constantly bombarding parents with the "dangers" of whatever creating a generation of second guessers and people who can't think for themselves or use the common sense they were given. (then again, I know some parents who don't have the common sense God gave a goose)

    Other than that...it's a simple case of people not wanting to (or not being able to) think for themselves.
    TiccledBlue

    Answer by TiccledBlue at 3:04 PM on Jan. 13, 2009

  • I agree! Its the excessive amounts of information on what we "should" be doing or what we "shouldn't" be doing or whats "normal" for a child. Given general guidelines for development of physical abilities/motor skills is an exception. I say that for the most part, go with your gut. Hundreds of thousands of generations survived without books and magazines and the "essential" baby educational toys and videos. If I had listened to "everyone" else, my kids wouldn't have developed as early as they did. Both my boys (now 2 and 1) were walking before 11 months, eating baby food by 3 months and eating "real" food and by 6 months, and on cow's milk by age 10 months. Listen to other parents that you trust and that are world-smart. Professionals are not the only ones with answers!
    ozarkgirl3

    Answer by ozarkgirl3 at 3:44 PM on Jan. 13, 2009

  • I didn't. Most moms read too much t.v and read too many dag gone books!!
    Godswk

    Answer by Godswk at 5:17 PM on Jan. 13, 2009

  • People are so unafraid to be "loud" about their opinions these days, but most new mamas are terribly afraid of parenting "wrong." When you are bombarded so much with everyone's opinions, you lose confidence in the decisions you make. Definitely tough on moms!
    TeaAnderson

    Answer by TeaAnderson at 9:07 PM on Jan. 13, 2009

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