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i don't understand relationships? please help

my fiance tells me most of the time, of how much he does for me . he pay the bill, sometimes he gives me money and much more, this really bothers me because i have always been a independend woman. and this makes me think if he is the one. do you think he is doing the right thing.


Asked by Anonymous at 12:22 PM on Jan. 14, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • maybe he needs more apperication for what he does. not saying that you don't appericate him, but maybe he needs to hear the words more often. there is a book called the five languages of love and it really helps even the best of marriages. it sounds like his love language is "words of affermation", and you show your love in a different way, so he doesn't hear what he needs often enough? again not bashing or anything, just thinking you two are speaking different languages

    Answer by bi-polarmommy at 2:06 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • That sucks, is he reminding you of all the stuff he does for you? I would wonder the same thing, cause you don't want to hear all that for the rest of your life...

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:26 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • I feel the same way, and i want a job, so i can still be "independent" in a sense.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:26 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • No. he is not doing the right thing by reminding you how much he does for you. That is bad if he does remind you all the time. I hate people like that.

    Answer by aznblond9 at 12:28 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • YOu have a job if you're staying home taking care of your guys' kids...maybe you should remind him of do a lot taking care of children and the home...did you ever ask him why he keeps telling you all these things HE does for you? Ask him and wait for his answer, don't let him blow it off..

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:29 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • I would say if you can get out and get a job so you have some independence and money of your own. You dont need someone throwing in your face all the time what they do for you. Or you could just start saying "Well yes, and I am greatful for everything you do.......... I clean your house, sweep the floor, dishes, laundry, clean sheets on the bed, cook for you, etc, etc, etc. Just because he may be the one giving you "money" doesnt mean that you sit on your rear and do nothing all day!

    Answer by MyMayBaby_Chloe at 12:30 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • With all due respect...if you do not understand relationship...then why are you getting married??
    when people do things for you, they do it because they want to...they do not do it and then throw it up in your face...The are other reasons he is throwing it up in your face..
    Your realtionship is already on a rocky road..follow your instincts...if you do not think he is the one..
    discontinue the relationship...

    Answer by Dannee at 12:44 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • You sound to young and immature to be getting married.


    Answer by louise2 at 12:47 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • i don't think him telling you what all he does is right. someone that gives so unselfishly wouldn't make it a point to tell you. he should do it cause he loves you and wants to make you happy. not to throw it in your face and get rewards for them or whatever he is trying to get out of you. i would not marry this man. he sounds selfish. i wouldn't waste any more time with him. i would leave him.

    Answer by melody77 at 12:56 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • why does he feel the need to bring this up? you aren't married yet and money is already an issue. if it's such a problem, he needs to take a hike. you don't need guilt. he's supposed to love you.

    Answer by mrsmostafa at 1:15 PM on Jan. 14, 2009