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Should I give my daughter hugs while volunteering at her school?

I volunteer at my daughter's school once a month. Yesterday she threw a fit because I wouldn't give her a hug while I was presenting a picture. I told her to go sit down and remember her "body basics". Her teacher and the other mom told me that I handled it ok, but I still don't think I did it very well. My daughter yelled, "I never get any hugs!" after being told to sit down. Truth is, every time she asks for a hug, she gets one.

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Asked by RoseWolf at 2:07 PM on Jan. 14, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (9)
  • then she just wanted all of your attention at school. Don't you love the manipulation??

    Answer by MammaMia72 at 2:08 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • I volunteer at my children's school twice a week and I hug my kiddos all the time there is nothing wrong with it unless you are doing something in front of the class as you were. You did the right thing in my oppinion. Maybe you should explain to her that if you are doing something for the whole class she needs to sit like she would for the teacher and when you are done she can have her hugs.

    Answer by happyathomemum at 2:18 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • I would hug my son when I would get there and before I left. But if I were doing something that was in front of the class, or helping another student, I would tell him that he needed to sit down and that he could have a hug when I was done. I did just that, as happyathome suggested. I told him to think of me as a teacher when I was addressing other students or the entire class.

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 2:28 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • Yes, I hug mine anytime I see them at school. But I would also remind her that when someone is talking (even Mom!) it is bad manners to interrupt. Let her know you expect her to stay in her seat if that is what her classmates are doing, and hugs will be for another time. I had to tell my kindergartner that, for now, I can't volunteer in his class, because he can't handle me leaving. If she cannot behave as your need her to, you may have to set the same rule until she is ready to handle not being the sole recipient of you attention.

    Answer by yarnjunkie at 3:41 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • You should hug her. That's your child.

    Answer by Princess1217 at 3:49 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • yup just like all the moms above i would always hug my kids

    Answer by FIVEHAPPYHEARTS at 5:03 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • I volunteer at my child's school, when he starts being disruptive because of me I have to remind him that I will stop coming in if he can't behave while I am there.

    Answer by armywifega at 8:11 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • I hug my kids while there, I even hug their friends. But not when I am in the middle of something and like army wife said, gentle reminders that you will stop coming if she chooses not to behave while you are there usually clears things up.

    Answer by MomShawn70 at 8:27 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • I think a hug is fine. If it is excessive or she wants to sit in you lap, then you need to draw the line. Talk to her at home, remind her the night before you volunteer next. Then give a hug at school. It makes her feel loved, proud, and included. Move right back to what you were doing. She may just want to establish that you are "her mom" and make a little kid point by showing off a tiny bit. I'd let her have it.


    Answer by Teachermom01 at 10:37 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

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