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I am 23 and have 2 wonderful girls,2 and 7months. It seems that after every child i have my sex drive goes down even more... It is to the point that i really don't have the desire for sex at all i just do it for my husband! Is this normal? and will my sex drive ever come back??? Please help!

lost sex drive, how to get it back?

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Asked by setliff at 5:50 PM on Jan. 14, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (6)
  • Do you think that it could be that you are subconsciously afraid of getting pregnant? Do you have a reliable form of birth control? If that's not it, it could be that you are just too overwhelmed by the exhausting work of motherhood that zaps our sex drives sometimes.I have fallen in bed after a 16 hour day MANY times, and did not want to do ANYTHING but sleep!!

    Answer by Aprilmorgans at 6:06 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • You have 2 kids honey!! Thats going to wear you out, and I would think sex would be furthest from your mind. I'm thinking it would be me anyway.

    Answer by Tiffany237 at 6:10 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • trust me chasing after two kids can cause a low sex drive

    Answer by mommie2twogirls at 6:26 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • Have you brought this up with your OB or general doctor? Do you have any other possible symptoms? I have two kids and number three on the way and still have a ravenous sex drive. Can you identify - are you simply tired? If you're home with the kids, are you taking a nap when they nap? If you're working -- are you going to bed shortly after they do, to make sure you're getting ample rest? Is there an emotional reason you don't want sex -- like another poster suggested, fear of pregnancy, or are you angry at your SO for not helping more with the kids? Lots of things can affect sex drive. Are you exercising? Do you *feel* sexy? Are you making time to feel good about you? All of these things can increase libido. I've also found that the more I get the more I want... so sometimes just getting the ball rolling and doing it when the drive wasn't there helped rekindle my fire. :) Good luck!

    Answer by Serafyna at 7:10 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • Do you feel comfortable with how you look? That might be part of it. I know thats my issue. I still have a lot of belly fat from having my baby yet. I'm working on getting rid of that so hopefully I'll feel better about myself and we can have more fun in the bedroom.


    Answer by dtetz at 10:33 AM on Jan. 15, 2009

  • You know i'm not really in love with the way i look, but i do actually weigh less than i did when i first got pregnant, so i am thankfull for what my body does look like compaired to what it could look like... I'm not afraid of getting pregnant. I don't really know what it is, moybe hormones??? It really hit when i had my last girl, i got the depo shot (which i have never had) it didn't go so good... Maybe there are some sort of sideffects from that (who knows). Thanks for all the help.

    Answer by setliff at 11:23 AM on Jan. 15, 2009

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