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What to do about bullies?

My 11 year old son came home from school yesterday and told me that a 7th grader, (from another school, b/c his school only goes up to 6th grade) came up to him and said "you made my sister cry yesterday." My son had no idea who this kids was, he kept trying to egg him on and fight, but my son told him he didn't know what he was talking about and eventually the kid left him alone. Im sure there is more to the story, but that is all he will admit. So today he figured out who the girl is and she told him two 7th graders want to beat him up. He also told me that he pointed out to their science team captain that this gril was not participating. So I guess it all stems from that. But what should I do? Should I just leave it @ that as long as this kids doesn't say anything else or should I involve the teachers?


Asked by 4monkees at 7:10 PM on Jan. 14, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

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Answers (4)
  • I think that so far he needs to handle this himself. It sounds like hes doing a good job. Tell him to keep his cool and refuse to fight at all. It will probably blow over quickly, but if for some reason it escalates or becomes physical in ANY way, and that includes any of them laying a hand on him, then it goes to the administration. Tell your son to keep blameless so that if he has to report this, he can remain out of trouble.

    Answer by momofsaee at 9:55 AM on Jan. 15, 2009

  • i woudl just warn teh teachers to keep an eye out. Dont necessarily have them intervene, because then the bullies may take it out on him for being a nark. I would let them know just to watch whats going on but not intervene unless they see or hear something. this will keep him safe in more ways then one

    Answer by Amanduhpanda at 7:12 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • My daughter, now 10, had an incident last year on the bus with a boy who would swat her on the butt every time she went by. I'm pretty sure it was just his way of getting her attention, but explained to my daughter that it was totally unacceptable, and she was very uncomfortable about it, but she told him to stop a couple times and he didn't. So my advice to her was "the next time you walk past him, stop, get right up in his face, and quietly say - you touch me again and I will knock you out." - She was worried about getting in trouble from the bus driver and I explained that if she did, I'd be intervening and this boy would be OFF the bus. Kids can't go looking for confrontation, but I've learned from years of being brutally shy as a kid, that if you DON'T stand up for yourself, it does not stop. So she took my advice, and the kid never touched her again!

    Answer by jjandjsmomma at 7:35 PM on Jan. 14, 2009

  • I usually just call the school w/ a heads up and wait and see if it dies down. It seems like if you let the school know you are watching what is up, they won't let certain things happen. Some people do turn their heads. I also tell the school when I call they cannot say it was me that let them know. Then when my child comes hm, I play dumb.

    Answer by KARRIEMARIE at 9:25 AM on Jan. 15, 2009

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