Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

anyone else have a shi**y relationship with their mom???

So, I dont speak to my mom anymore for a couple of reasons, and I was just wondering if anyone else either A.) doesnt speak to their mother or B.) has a bad relationship with their mom... I no longer speak to my mother because she has gone against me in court regarding my son (she sides with my ex on custody issues, even said once that "she(me) has no right to be a mother"), she kicked me out of her house when i was 18 but tried to keep my son, and among other things has just backstabbed and betrayed me on many levels... and now she is doing it to my sister, who has a 6 month old... it just kinda hurts that my own mother could/would/has treated me this way, especially now that im pregnant again... I have a great relationship with my dad and step mom, and even with my in laws but i dont have a mom anymore... does anyone else feel like this or is it just me??

Answer Question
 
blondie09

Asked by blondie09 at 10:15 PM on Jan. 15, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • I love my mom and we have a great relationship. I'm sorry that you have a problem with your mom. If I was out of control and not able to properly raise my child I would expect her to do what your mom has done but not otherwise.
    coala

    Answer by coala at 10:19 PM on Jan. 15, 2009

  • No, you are not alone. It's not just you. Sounds like our moms might be related. Sorry, I know how hard it is to just want a mom, a real mom, someone who wants to be a mom, to feel like we weren't the worst mistakes in their lives, or to feel like we're not to blame for every damn bad thing. We're good people, we live as well as we can, and we're supposed to have that one asset that will never fail..... a mom. But we don't. I'm so sorry, I really had hoped that no one else knew what it was like to be rejected and abandoned by their mom.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:21 PM on Jan. 15, 2009

  • wow, you don't have a shi**y relationship with her, you don't have one at all. sorry for that. best you can do is make your best effort to not return this behavior to your child. decide now that your relationship will not be this way, no matter what happens in life. people do stupid things..but love is love and i hope you take the high road with your child(ren). motherhood is tough, but its tougher when issues aren't addressed. i'm not saying you have to accept everything as it comes, but learn from your mother/daughter mistakes. also, be there for your sister! good luck..and again, sorry.
    thehairnazi

    Answer by thehairnazi at 10:25 PM on Jan. 15, 2009

  • I don't speak to my mom because she dated a twice convicted kidnapper who constantly tried to take my son "to a football game"!!! When I confronted her about his kidnapping charges, she said she knew about it and that it was none of my business. However, throughout my teen years, I was always sexually harassed by her various boyfriends who she swore she was in love with. Those things hurt me, but the sh*t concerning my son was the last straw. That incident happened in Aug. 2005 and she hasn't seen my son since. I had twin boys in Dec 2007 and she's never seen them other than pictures I've given her out of the kindness of my heart. I really just dont trust her anymore!
    majesticchild

    Answer by majesticchild at 11:16 PM on Jan. 15, 2009

  • My siblings and I haven't spoken to my mother in 6 years,she refused to go to my nephew's (her grandsons) funeral because her and my brother were on bad terms at the time and he called her and said he wanted her there- she said he could not tell her what to do and that was basically the last time any of us talked to her. I have run into her a few times since and last summer I saw her and we had "friendly chat" for the few minutes we were next to each other at a fair food line, when we walked away my son said mom that was weird, like an old school friend not your mother. Every time we have seen her since the incident she has made it worse and never even attempted to make it better- that would mean apologizing to her children and admitting she made a bad decision- oh the horror of a mother apologizing to her kids!
    goaliemom93

    Answer by goaliemom93 at 11:18 PM on Jan. 15, 2009

  • i have a horrible relationship wit my mom too myy parents got divorced when i was 2 and she hardley came and got us we lived wit our dad and she met another man had my brother and told my dad she had a new family and didnt need us anymore.. shes never really liked me we have never got along and now that i have my son she treats him different then she treats my sisters kids.. i get along with my dad and step mom. my stepmom was wit me through my whole pregnancy and even when my son went into the nicu my mom still wasnt there
    MiSs.SmOkEy

    Answer by MiSs.SmOkEy at 11:32 PM on Jan. 15, 2009

  • I haven't spoken to my mother in about 10 yrs. She writes to me sometimes, I wrote her back once about 4 yrs ago to tell her I was pg, but that was it. She doesn't even know about my 2nd son. There's a lot of issues with her! I honestly don't feel bad about not having a relationship with her. Because of everything that happened with her, I feel like I'm better off, my kids will be better off. If you want to talk, feel free to message me!
    mom2XandZ

    Answer by mom2XandZ at 12:24 AM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • I too have a bad relationship with my mother. She was physcially abusive until the day I moved out when I was 16. She's blackened eyes, broken bones, torchered me, beat me until I bled. I forgive her for everything she has done. She has an illness, but she won't get help. She's always been nice to my children. We visit her a few times a year. She's only visited us twice. She points fingers at everyone else! She's actually opened a phone account in my name because she couldn't get one in her own! She wasn't smart enough to think of caller id when she called me!! I could write a book. She's my mother though. I love her, and only want the best for her. I tried to get her to move here with us, so she could get a new start. She told me she couldn't do that because her friends were there! They're a bunch of drunk ass drug addicts! Excuse my language. I will never trust her, but I will always love her. Good Luck!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:50 PM on Jan. 17, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN