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Just want to ask.....

I had a boyfriend for 3 years and found out that he is married, yes I know, how naive can I be. Anyway, I have a 9mos old son with him and he hasn't helped finacially yet. I am afraid that if I take him to court for child support that he will try to gain custody of my little man. I can't let that happen! He makes a lot more money then me and i am really scared. He had told me that he had only one child but I think that he had 2, not sure if its only the wifes or not. Please help. any thoughts anyone

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Asked by dmeh23 at 11:15 AM on Jan. 16, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • Just because he makes more money does not mean he will get Custody!!!! He has to prove you un fit to get custody. If your not hooked on drugs or drinking or abusing your child you don't really have anything to worry about! The more he makes compared to you the more child support you will get!!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:17 AM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • i know someone who went to school and was a waitress and already had one child and had a baby with another guy and he is a pharmacist and she got full custody of her :) money doesn't mean a thing

    Answer by krazyash023 at 11:19 AM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • I would find out were he lives and go have a talk with his wife.

    I hope you broke up with him.

    The above anonymous,5:17.  I agree with about court and custody.


    Answer by louise2 at 11:22 AM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • I am with the previous posters, unless you are unfit, primary custody tradionally goes to the mother. The more he makes, the more child support he is required to give. Don't be afraid to go after what rightfully belongs to your son. He deserves the best life you can provide for him, and that means holding his father financially responsible for his upbringing. Don't let the lying scumbag bully you into thinking he has any power over you.

    Answer by Danielle720 at 11:24 AM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • How would it look for him to go to court and say "yea while I was married, I tricked this woman in to thinking I was single and now my wife and I want to raise the baby I conceived with her".
    I'm guessing the wife doesn't even know anything about you or your baby and she'd have to be willing to try to raise another woman's baby knowing her husband is the father and deal with you on visitaions etc and I dont' think that's going to happen..

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 12:07 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • Do you know how hard it is for the perfect man to gain custody of his child(ren) even if the mother isn't exactly "fit." You sound like you are a good mother albeit you were a little naive but to deny your child of the support that is owed to him would be even worse. They will not take your child away and they will look at his income and you will receive (typically) 1/3 of his income before takes. Do not worry. Just get your son the support he deserves. Good luck:)

    Answer by micrespo at 12:30 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • Go and take care of this now don't wait that sucks that he is married and you never knew or suspected shame on him to having an affair knowing he had a child with someone and married at that. If I were you I would start to do something about it before it is too late there is no telling what he could say about you to get his child from you. Don't trust him anymore if he was able to pull over the wool over yours eyes once what makes you think he won't do it again. Don't be a fool... again. GL Think of your baby and you.

    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 12:45 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • You are a wonderful person and a wonderful mom! There is no way that he could custody of the baby! I love you! Stay strong!

    Answer by hannahlove27 at 4:12 PM on Jan. 23, 2009

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