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How do I tell her she is ruining her life?

My younger sister who turned 18 last June is ruining her life. We were raised by our single mom. The trouble is she is a singer.I mean a really good singer and has been doing small tours since she was 15. About 8 months ago she got a new guitar player in her band.He seemed really nice at first, but I always had a weird feeing about him.he just seemed sneaky... She started dating him, which the band leader was totally against. It went down hill from there.The boyfriend screwed up and got suspended from the band, they were in negotiations at the time with 3 BIG record companies. Long story shorter. My sister got mad, quit the band, moved out of my moms house, got really sick 2 months later, didn't tell anyone in the family, was near death, found out she got clymydia , the infection got into her bloodstream.Now they are getting married in 2 weeks.

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Asked by Anonymous at 4:57 PM on Jan. 16, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • Well its too bad she is 18 and you could do more I would just talk and talk and talk and talk some more to her and try to get her to understand!! Sounds like she had alot going for her and some scum bag messed it up for her!! wish i had more advice!!

    Answer by scaredmommy08 at 5:01 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • I'm sorry to tell you this, but she will only learn from her mistakes......... I'm having a similar issue with my sis and telling her that I didn't approved of "X" guy just pushed her away. They need to fall in order to learn not to trip on the same place again. You need to be there for her when she falls... Good LUck

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:01 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • oh my lord! that has to be the worst story ive ever heard! you dont want to push her too hard, because then she will marry him out of spite. i wish i had the answer. maybe try and talk to her calmly. dont be angry or yell at her, that will push her away. explain to her that you love her and you want to know why she is marrying him. tell her how you feel (stay calm) and explain to her what you think about him. tell her you love her and will always be there for her because youre sisters, but if she does this, you just dont know how you could support her anymore.
    i wish i had a better answer im so sorry

    Answer by Amanduhpanda at 5:02 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • I don't know of anything you can do. She has her mind made up. As hard as it is, we sometimes have to stand and watch our loved ones run headlong into a brick wall. There will likely come a day when she will need you to help her pick up the pieces of her shattered life. I think you just have to wait until that day comes. I'm sorry!

    Answer by NannyB. at 5:03 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • You can preach and preach but in the end your sister is going to do what she wants to do. Sometimes ppl just need to learn the hard way and come to realize that he's no good. So there's really nothing you can do

    Answer by Krystle21 at 5:10 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • There isn't much you can do except let her make the mistake and learn on her own, I went through this with my sister when she turned 18 she decided that she was going to do porn, and I told her repeatedly it was a huge mistake, even from my own experiences with it and how it ruins so many things and that she is better than that, well she did it anyways and stopped about 6 months ago and now has a great boyfriend, but hates the fact she ever did it because just like I told her it will come back to haunt you and now she knows and wished she had listened to me.

    Answer by hautemama83 at 5:15 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • she'll learn the hard way. unfortunately. who gave her chlamydia her boyfriend?

    Answer by melody77 at 5:41 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • Sounds like typical 19 year old behaviour, and not really a big deal.

    Answer by Liyoness at 6:33 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

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