Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

what is your take?

alot of people use day care, and most for very good reason. some parents would rather go to work to pay for an expensive vehicle, large house , designer cloths ect.. instead of staying home and raising their own kids. my opinion on this subject is that im willing to not have alot of those nice things so my daughter can be raised and loved by me. how can a car, house ect. ever be more important than precious momnents (and the not so precious moments). It is extremely boring for me at home but i think she deserves it, sure i would love some adult interaction, extra money and a break but thats not why i had my daughter. a friend of mine just had a premie (31 weeks), with some pretty rough bumps along the way. shes gonna drop her in day care when shes 3 months old, so she can still work for shopping $. please help me understand!? why would you go through the trouble of building a family, to not be there?

 
scanamey77

Asked by scanamey77 at 7:23 PM on Jan. 16, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 9 (333 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (32)
  • im a single mom..and i HATE HATE HAAAAATE going to work..i went back to work when my daughter turned one, and then my mom started looking after her while i worked..it sucks! i mean, ya its nice, thats its my mom lookin after her, so i dont have to pay her as much as i would a daycare center, but still..if i could afford to stay home with her, you bet your asssss i would!! i took time off work in july..only planned on taking a couple weeks off..i didnt wanna go back so bad, that i ended up quitting my job, and staying with her for 4 months..and it was great!! i just started working again end of nov..and i wish i didnt have to, i would LOVE to win the lotto!! lol
    alexis_06

    Answer by alexis_06 at 9:33 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • banging head into wall

    Wimsey

    Answer by Wimsey at 7:25 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • Mine was in daycare at 6 weeks. Didn't want to do it but I had to because i'm a military mama so I had to go back to work. I have come to realize though that her interaction with all the other children and the daycare women has made her learn things more quickly and doing things like rolling etc, a little earlier than others. So even though daycare sometimes has it's downfall it also has it's perks.
    smnice

    Answer by smnice at 7:29 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • Most families need to have both parents work, but just because some mom's choose to work so they can give their kids more or so they can have their dream house doesn't mean they love their kids any less.
    sammiesmom2000

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 7:30 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • ha, i just had a fight with my older sister about this very same thing..heres my story.. my sister went back to work on the day that my niece turned two months.. she gave her over to my mother to watch her.. my mother was with my niece day and night.. she has raised her as her own.. my sister use to only seem y niece on the weekends.. so now my niece is three yrs old and my sister works mon-fri and has the weekends off..
    MommaBear1129

    Answer by MommaBear1129 at 7:32 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • she has a nice apt that she pays too much for.. a nice car.. that she pays too much for.. a coach purse that she def. paid too much for.. but my niece doesnt recognize her as her mothr.. ME ON THE OTHER HAND.. I'VE WORKED YEA. BUT I'D RATHER NOT HAVE ANYTHING AND BE AT HOME WITH MY CHILD. I MEAN SHIT.. I DONT HAVE CABLE. I HAVE THE NECCESSARY.. AND THATS ALL I NEED! AS LONG AS I HAVE A ROOF OVER MY HEAD AND CLOTHES ON MY BODY I DONT NEED THE COACH PURSE, I DONT NEED THE EXPENSIVE STUFF.. BUT ID' RATHER HAVE MY CHILD CALL ME MOMMA THAN CALL SOMEONE ELSE THAT!

    UHHG MY SISTER AND I FIGHT ABOUT THIS ISSUE CONSTANTLY.. SO YEAH I DONT KNOW
    MommaBear1129

    Answer by MommaBear1129 at 7:32 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • Well, I live in a trailor that costs 10,000. I drive the same car I got when I was 16 years old. 97 model.
    I haven't bought clothes in FOREVER and when I do they aren't designer.
    I have to have foodstamps to feed my family.
    I NEED a job.
    We can't even pay our bills. DH works.
    I don't think that's true about what you said.
    Some people work because one person working is not enough...In my situation it is not enough.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:43 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • Oh and before anyone says.."Then why do you have internet?"
    It's my moms computer not mine. We have no tv, no internet, no phone and still struggling.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:46 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • I work full time as does my husband. We have a 3 bedroom home, two cars, insurance, mortgage, college savings fund. We don't have loads of extra money to spend on designer clothing. We save our money for household improvements, family vacations, and the 'what ifs'. I love my child and spend as much time as I can with her. I also have a standard of living that I desire and will not settle for less (clean house, no bugs, etc). I'm going working just to buy these things. My daughter has been in day care since 8 weeks. She loves going to day care and has learned a lot! She's very social and has benefited greatly from the environment. It does not mean that I do not love my child because I choose to work. I say that I have to work. You say I choose to work b/c I could get a cheaper, smaller house and stay at home, but I cannot do that.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:47 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • I understand both points and agree with both. I worked in daycare for 5 years. Now I am a new mommy and have been working mornings, my friend and neighbor sits for a few hours a day. We are military families. In 3 weeks I am going to stop working in the mornings when my husband starts his intense flight school. We have lived with one car for a year now, since we have moved to where we are now. I have decided it is not worth it to me to get a full time job to send a baby to day care and have a car payment and the other added expenses for a car. To me breaking even isn't worth it. Now if I had a job where we would be making a lot more money, it would be different....
    MissHeidi0304

    Answer by MissHeidi0304 at 7:51 PM on Jan. 16, 2009