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i just want to do it.....

so i have posted a few questions about natural birth and me and my SO fighting over me doing it
well i told the rest of my fmaily and the only people who think i can do it is my step-mom my aunt and my birth doula
well im starting to get mad that my family and SO dont support my choice
i told them im doing it eather way the nmy SO (who is a medic in the army)
said that i was gonna put alot of stress on my body and that it was bad for the baby and to just get the drugs
i was wondering if anyone has advice on wut i should do
i cant just ignor them or tell them to f**k off
cuz it is family and the guy i love and i dont wnat to have to do that
is there any other way

Answer Question

Asked by 19bubbles91 at 9:43 PM on Jan. 16, 2009 in Pregnancy

Level 5 (68 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • It doesn't put stress on the baby...that's ridiculous. People...wait, WOMEN, have been giving birth without drugs for a LONG LONG LONG time (not that there's anything wrong with those wonderful pain blockers, don't get me wrong). It's your body, it's your choice. Don't let them bully you into something you'll regret later.

    Answer by KaroGreenly at 9:52 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • your just going to put stress on your body and its bad for the baby? how does he think women had babies before the days of epidurals? lots of women have babies naturally. Sorry i'm not a lot of help because i had an epi, but ive heard natural labor is usually shorter than a labor with pain meds. you can do anything you put your mind to, good luck.

    Answer by Chandra034 at 9:53 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • Natural is the healthiest way! I was aimin for natural but the nurses said I was screaming too loud and I had to have a ep. done. I hated it and it did not help one bit I still felt all the pain. I did it because my mom convienced me but that was a bad idea. Go with your gut. Remind everyone that this baby is coming out of YOUR body not theirs and if they want the drugs tell them to have the baby =). Trust me a woman's body was made for childbirth no more stress will be put on your body than necessary. You'll be yourself again in no time no no wait i'm lying You'll be a mommy to someone new!!!!

    Answer by jjsmommi5 at 9:55 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • I went wasn't planned that way, but both me and my son were perfectly fine =) It's your body. I would do whatever you feel is best.

    Answer by Krystal.Ingalls at 9:57 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • I don't know the details of your previous conversations, but you can educate them. You can simply speak the words "This is what I am doing." And then walk away/change the subject... Or not bring it up anymore at all, ever.

    This is your decision. You CAN deliver a baby without drugs, this is a choice. Having support only makes it nicer and easier. But it can be done.

    Answer by doulala at 10:15 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • (cont.)

    The environment (home, hospital, birth center) and the attendants (OB, FP, Midwife, doula) will be factors that play an important role.

    I know of many women who turn their backs on those who don't support them. Women need to do what is best for themselves & their babies. It's unfortunate to have to remove themselves from relationships with loved ones, but some women feel it is that important.

    Maybe by reminding your family that this IS how you'll do it, they can know that by supporting you, they will be able to have a better relationship with you and your child(ren).

    Answer by doulala at 10:15 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • I am the same way. The only people who support my decision is luckily my husband and mother and they are the only ones allowed in the room. Everyone else says I am stupid and it would medically be better if I had drugs, but I just remind them that my body is made to do this and I trust it will make it through. I instinctively know what to do and how to handle childbirth and I don't need medicine to mess it all up.

    Answer by bluelady27 at 10:30 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • Oh honey I feel for you! My family was the same way. Only two people thought I could do it, a close friend and my DH. It actually puts more stress on your body and on the baby if you do take the drugs, especially an epidural. I did a TON of research on it before I gave birth, because I wanted a natural birth. An epidural can slow down your labor which can lead to them giving you pitocin, which causes very strong contractions and can lead to fetal distress. Don't freak out about that, though. It isn't an every birth kind of occurance, it's just a possibility. I was in labor for about 65 hours with my DD. When I hit transitional labor, I was exhausted and starving. When I was at about 9-9.5cm I asked for an epidural, and I got it...When it was time to push.

    Answer by Mrs.BAT at 11:15 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • It never worked and I can honestly say that it wasn't that bad and if I ever have another baby, he or she will be born naturally. Don't let anyone tell you you can't do it, because you can! Your body was made for this. But, if you reach a point (as I did) where you really don't think you can handle it anymore, it's ok to ask for pain relief. Good luck and let me know how things go!

    Answer by Mrs.BAT at 11:16 PM on Jan. 16, 2009

  • My advice is to do your homework. Go online or to the library and print out articles about the benefits of natural birth. There's a documentary called "The Business of Being Born' that goes into a lot of the benefits of natural birth (it will actually scare your family/BF about all medication!). You should rent it and watch it with all of them. Some people just don't want to question OB's and the way birthing is normally done (in a hospital with lots of drugs). My MIL is like this, she would warn me about reading too much and said I was going to scare myself, but I feel empowered being educated about birth and watching birth videos. Some people just think OB's and all that medication is the way it should be.

    Answer by danielp at 12:37 AM on Jan. 17, 2009

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