What do you think about a parent that refers to their child as....

"the boy", "the girl", "the child" etc?

My ex refers to our DS as "the boy" always has. Never his name. I'm not talking about saying it from time to time but ALWAYS refers to their child this way.

What do you think? Does it bug you? Does it take away from the child at all? Or is that just how some people are?

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Asked by amazinggrace83 at 5:06 PM on Feb. 7, 2012 in Parenting Debate

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That's odd. Are they otherwise close?

Answer by adnilm at 5:11 PM on Feb. 7, 2012
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That's so funny, because my husband had an office mate that referred to his wife, Cathy as "the wife", even though we knew her and socialized with them. I think it's degrading and awful.

I had another friend who when she got married always referred to her husband, Marty as "my husband", like she was rubbing it in my face. Needless, to say we have lost contact with each other.

Answer by robinkane at 5:12 PM on Feb. 7, 2012
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I think this is a closeness issue..maybe they should get out together by themselves to bond. I don't know details. Hope they are fine!

**You should answer my question(:

Answer by Maybemommy27 at 5:13 PM on Feb. 7, 2012
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That's odd. Are they otherwise close?
Answer by adnilm 3 minutes ago

I find it strange too.... he is 8 years old and an every other weekend dad, but it bugs the crap out of me. He has a name or even my son or my boy would make it better than "the boy". He has a daughter from another woman, he calls he "the girl"... she is only 4. I think maybe he has huge detachment issues or something.

Comment by amazinggrace83 (original poster) at 5:17 PM on Feb. 7, 2012
Credits: 41866 Level 29 Parenting Debate 101
DS is 8, that response was odd lol

Comment by amazinggrace83 (original poster) at 5:18 PM on Feb. 7, 2012
Credits: 41866 Level 29 Parenting Debate 101
Omg don't think to far into it... My dad and grand father on my mother side refers my brother and son as the boy. Mind you my lil brother is the only boy and the baby of 3 girls. My brother is spoiled because he is the only boy on both sides of the family. If it bothers you, question him. Every family is different. What I'm trying to say is don't get upset till you ask him.

Answer by christinkie at 5:21 PM on Feb. 7, 2012
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General question and was using my ex as an example. Anyway. I said I find it odd and it irritates me but its not like I want to have a huge discussion with him.... LMAO.

Comment by amazinggrace83 (original poster) at 5:25 PM on Feb. 7, 2012
Credits: 41866 Level 29 Parenting Debate 101
It doesnt bother me. Sometimes I tell dh "Get the girl" referring to dd especially if it has been a long tiring day.

Answer by gemgem at 5:29 PM on Feb. 7, 2012
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What do I think about myself? I think my child not only knows his name, but yep he knows he's a boy, he's a child, and my baby!

Answer by maecntpntz219 at 5:29 PM on Feb. 7, 2012
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I personally think it shows a lack of connection or emotion. I have never known anyone who did this, but I think it would bug me if my husband spoke that way about our son or myself. It just seems so impersonal.

Answer by hootie826 at 5:29 PM on Feb. 7, 2012
Credits: 30117 Level 27 Parenting Debate Minor

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