Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

finding time for ourself as a single mom

i am a single mom of 2 (9 & 5) i can not seem to find the balance i feel i need. i dont have anyone to watch my kids(they are always with me never go to their dads)and having family watch them really isnt an option. i feel like all i do is things for them and work and somehow I am lost in it all

Answer Question
 
lostcontrol

Asked by lostcontrol at 9:58 AM on Jan. 17, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • But your doing a good job. Most mom's even the ones that are married can relate with you on that. That's just what moms do. Take care of others. You will get some time to your self soon. Your oldest is going to be a teen in a couple of years.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 10:05 AM on Jan. 17, 2009

  • I find that sometimes I have to either get up early or stay up late to have some time for myself. It really kind of depends on what you want to do with that time, too. If you just want to take a bubble bath or watch a movie, staying up late or getting up early works great. If you're wanting to go out, say for a drink or to wander a bookstore or something, maybe find a friend who has children around the same age or maybe the parent of one of your children's friends and see about swapping some babysitting, since you say you can't have family watch them. Also, they are old enough that if you really just need a few minutes to breathe or relax or whatever, you can just tell them "Mom needs ____ minutes alone. Go play in your rooms, outside, watch TV, something." Mine are 7 & 5 and I sometimes tell them that.
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 10:36 AM on Jan. 17, 2009

  • In addition to what tropicalmama said, determine your priorities - if you put yourself higher up and some other things lower down, then it doesn't look so bad. Maybe the chores can wait a day or two so you can have some down time. Don't be a super-mom thinking you have to do it all, clean it all, be it all. Just let something go today and enjoy the time as your own...pick up a good book and have the kids play in their room.
    JPsMommy605

    Answer by JPsMommy605 at 11:20 AM on Jan. 17, 2009

  • okay, I'm gonna tell you something I do when I can -- I don't pick them up right after work -- I leave them in after-school till 6 -- even if I got out at 3:30 so I can get a few minutes for myself.
    Other than that I have to say I hear you, I'm struggling with the same thing cause I'm also their one and only and well for example I still have a ton of stuff from December to return but can't find a second to do it in cause the stores with a 5 and 3 is something I try to do as little as possible (and not when I really need to think and/or talk with others)
    MamiJaAyla

    Answer by MamiJaAyla at 11:39 AM on Jan. 17, 2009

  • I get an afternoon to myself maybe enjoy once a month. Usually, I just stay up for a couple hours after DD goes to bed.
    epoh

    Answer by epoh at 12:23 PM on Jan. 17, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.

Next question in General Parenting
Have you ever?

Next question overall (Pregnancy)
breast feeding

close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN