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MY BOYFRIEND HAS OTHER KIDS BY SOMEONE ELSE AND WE HAVE TWO TOGETHER ALSO, WELL HE LETS HIS KIDS DO WHATEVER THEY WANT THEY TREAT ME LIKE CRAP,THEY GET INTO MY STUFF,THEY BRAKE MY KIDS TOYS AND HE DOES NOTHING ABOUT IT. WHAT CAN I DO??HES KIDS ARE 15 AND 14 YR OLD BOYS!!

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:31 PM on Jan. 17, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (17)
  • I am in a similar situation. My husband would stand up for me to his kids when we were engaged but as soon as we got married and had a child of our own, things changed and now its horrible. They are "allowed" to disrespect me because he does it when they are around. The kids often get everything and anything they want even though half his paycheck already goes to their mother and I am digging for change to feed myself and my newborn. I am considering divorce because I can not take this crap anymore! Since you are not married yet, I would say call your parents or a friend and see if you can stay with them until you can get on your feet again and leave him! Its hard to make it work when the significate other won't do anything to help and only helps the issues. Im sorry for what you are going through and good luck!
    1sttimemommy122

    Answer by 1sttimemommy122 at 2:06 AM on Jan. 18, 2009

  • Have you said anything to him about it? What did he say back?
    hautemama83

    Answer by hautemama83 at 1:42 PM on Jan. 17, 2009

  • I'm sorry that would have definitely stopped after the 2nd time. These boys need to show respect for you and your boyfriends new family. Just because you are not their mom they need to understand you CAN still tell them how to behave or they are not welcome in your home (unless they live with you and you need to set your foot down with your boyfriend). Why should you and your kids have to suffer. The ultimate choice would be calling the cops, its destruction or property or if they threathen you or your kids... scare them straight. Good luck
    Ibelucky1

    Answer by Ibelucky1 at 1:43 PM on Jan. 17, 2009

  • YES I HAVE ALL THE TIME BUT HE DOES NOTHING ABOUT IT LIKE ALWAYS!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:44 PM on Jan. 17, 2009

  • you should sit down with your husband first off and tell him how you feel ; Be strong about your feelings too ; He is showing his kids thats its ok to do that and its not ; even though you are not their mother ; doesnt mean they shouldnt have respect for you and your things ; He needs to step in and do something because it clearly needs to be fixed. If he doesnt respond to you talking to him ; or gets defensive ; or doesnt do anything to fix it ; than that clearly shows the respect level he has for YOU; YOUR THINGS; YOUR FEELINGS AND ALSO HIMSELF ; He should respect you and teach his kids respect as well. GOOD LUCK.
    kwiseman19

    Answer by kwiseman19 at 1:45 PM on Jan. 17, 2009

  • if he does nothing about it than step in ; you have every right to say something to those children about respecting YOUR SPACE AND YOUR HOUSE ; your boyfriend needs to be a man and do something ; .... i would not allow those children in my home if they were breaking and disresecting my things and my SO did nothing about it ; point blank.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:47 PM on Jan. 17, 2009

  • HES KIDS ALWAYS DO NO WRONG! HE TELLS ME ONE THING AND TELLS THEM SOMETHING DIFF. IM JUST SICK OF THIS! WHAT I SAY DONT MEAN NOTHING!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:48 PM on Jan. 17, 2009

  • Then you need tp put your foot down and be straight up and tell him you are sick of everytime the boys are there they have total lack of respect for you and your children, and he needs to do something about it before they come over again, just because you're not their mom doesn't mean they can just disrespect you like that, you are still an adult.
    hautemama83

    Answer by hautemama83 at 1:48 PM on Jan. 17, 2009

  • If your boyfreind will not do anything to fix the problem then there isn't much you can do. Just a thought but maybe he lets them get a way with stuff out of guilt for not living with them and having a family with you. Maybe he just doen't want them to think he favors his children with you over them. This doen't make it OK to let them disrespect you but just a reason. What are you prepared to do if things don't improve?
    Tawanda74

    Answer by Tawanda74 at 1:49 PM on Jan. 17, 2009

  • AND HE WANTS TO GET MARRIED IN JUNE,BUT I DONT KNOW ABOUT THAT! I JUST DONT KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:51 PM on Jan. 17, 2009