Punish for a kind heart

While waiting at the bus stop I noticed a neighbor fussing at her daughter. I asked her if everything is okay and she said "She let a little girl in her class have her jacket and sweater." I noticed that the daughter only had a Peter Pan blouse on. The mother went on to say that, "She is getting her butt tore out the frame when she get home." I asked her did she know who she gave her clothes to. The mother said "Some little girl at school, you can tell that she don't have many things." I said "I think your daughter was trying to show someone some kindness." The mother said, "If she wanted to buy the girl a jacket she should have told me and I would have done something." I told her that "She is five years old, Linda she does not think like us. She just saw someone in need and reacted. Please don't be to hard on her because she has a soft heart." If you was Linda how would you have handled the situation? I thought it was sweet of the little girl. I would have been proud of her act of kindness. Your thoughts?

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Asked by babygirl0782 at 5:20 PM on Feb. 13, 2012 in General Parenting

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Answers (12)

No way would I have been mad at my kid for that I'd be beaming with pride. I hate when parents expect their kids to act and think like adults. I would however tell her that it was a wonderful thing she did but ask that next time she let me know ahead of time. What a sweet kid though I hope she keeps that heart and that her mother doesn't ruin it!

Answer by maecntpntz219 at 5:28 PM on Feb. 13, 2012
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i would probably cry. i know my ds thinks about things like that. he always notices other kids or older/handicapped persons and asks seemingly innocent questions, but still, things that plague his mind and he worries about them! i could see my ds giving his jacket to someone at school. he'd casually think, ''mom will just buy me another one.'' and i would.

Answer by dullscissors at 5:28 PM on Feb. 13, 2012
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Def not that way,my kids have been on both end of the giving spectrum and I've always taught my kids that if someone needs help to step up because sometimes no one else will.

Answer by MarGeee at 5:25 PM on Feb. 13, 2012
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I would have told her the same. How sad to think she is in trouble for doing something kind :(
I hope her mom really re-thinks this

Answer by charlotsomtimes at 5:27 PM on Feb. 13, 2012
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My daughter would give our house away if I didn't tell her, sometimes mid "give" that she cannot do it. I can see the mother's point that you can't give away things you need and expect mom or dad to constantly be able to go buy more. I don't think she should be punished too harshly, but I do think it needs to stop. If it were my child, I would tell her that if she thinks someone truly needs something because they don't have the necessities at home, to tell me or the teacher and that we would see what we could do.

Answer by Mom-2-3-Girlz at 5:32 PM on Feb. 13, 2012
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My kid gives his stuff away all the time,, I THINK the mom was only thinking of the money and not the act,, hopefully her meaness will not transfer to the kid.

Answer by kimigogo at 5:46 PM on Feb. 13, 2012
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or maybe she was thinking of her own child's health

Answer by Dardenella at 5:50 PM on Feb. 13, 2012
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I would've been a little upset at first but, once understanding that she was trying to be kind then I wouldn't have been mad.

Answer by 3libras at 5:56 PM on Feb. 13, 2012
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I dont spank so obviously I would not have handled it that way and I think it is so entirely low class when a parent tells anyone they are going to wear their childs butt out or spank them. I mean like REALLY it lowers my view on them to the point I will avoid them at all costs. My kids know they are not rich, but not poor either. I cant afford for them to give their stuff away. However, they also know if a friend is in need and I can help I will do it. I have done it before. I dont think Id ever be in this sort of a situation because of that, but if I was I would probably go buy another jacket for the girl and pick my dds up.

Answer by gemgem at 6:34 PM on Feb. 13, 2012
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I wouldn't be as upset at my DD as that woman was but at the same time, this woman now has to go buy more clothes for her child, maybe she doesn't have the money for that. I am lucky that I can afford more then one jacket for my DD but not everyone else can. If my DD did this, I would explain to her that she doesn't have the right to give away things that I buy. If she sees someone in need, tell me and I'll see if we can't find an inexpensive jacket or sweater or something to give to this child.

Answer by JLS2388 at 4:43 AM on Feb. 14, 2012
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