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Help 3 year old medicail/legal issue

Father of child has child for a matter of hours ,during his visitation & claims she is haveing a hard time "going" the first try on the potty.Should there be a good reason to put on a rubber glove & remove poop from your daughters rectum? What would your reaction be if your daughters father had done this?

also we have joint custody, we both have to consult on all medicail matters..

in stead of calling me (or the pediatrician)

before hand- he did this & told me after,also claims he can & will do it again,(though II have asked him not to & so has the pediatrician)she's already in therapy for strange statments & actions after visitations..

What can or should I do??

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Asked by jellybeangreen at 1:11 AM on Jan. 18, 2009 in About CafeMom

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Answers (7)
  • I don't think this is a medical issue. There's no need to stick your fingers up a toddlers butt and pull out thier poop, that's just discusting and and a serious invasion of her body. This dude is screwed in the head! Call the police.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:23 AM on Jan. 18, 2009

  • I agree--no normal dad would be putting his fingers in his daughter's orifices, especially after being TOLD NOT TO by the pediatrician. Get ahold of your attorney, and see if you need to file a police report. I think this dude needs to have his visitation supervised, or revoked. I don't know if he just does not know better, or if he's got serious perv issues going on, but I know this--where there's smoke there's FIRE!! Take whatever steps are necessary to protect your little girl.

    Answer by Aprilmorgans at 1:29 AM on Jan. 18, 2009

  • The guy sounds like a perv - take your baby to the doctors office tell him what has been going on- there is no way I would let that pervert anywhere near my child.

    Answer by misskimmy62 at 2:46 AM on Jan. 18, 2009

  • Does the child have any sort of history with having trouble in this area? For example, has she had bouts of being constipated? Any UTIs? If so, what was done in the past for her? Even though her father may have been told not to do what he did, does he understand why he shouldn't? Or perhaps he does but may have felt doing this would help her quicker than waiting for a DR to call back? I think as a parent we've all been in that situation at one time or another. Your post made your ex out as though he were some kind of sexual criminal who can't be trusted around children. If that were the case, then why are you even allowing your daughter to spend any time with him at all? Court ruled or not, I would not allow someone with that kind of character/background around my children. Like I said, more info would have been helpful.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:27 AM on Jan. 18, 2009

  • " I think as a parent we've all been in that situation at one time or another." I just want to clarify that I did not mean this as "we've all been in the situation where we had to choose whether or not to stick our hands up our child's rear". No, that is not how I meant that. I meant that as a parent we've all been in situations before where we did what we felt was the best thing for our child at that particular time. Perhaps he felt the child was in pain and that calling someone such as you or the DR and then waiting for a return call would have put the child in even more distress so he did what he thought was right at the time.


    Answer by Anonymous at 5:31 AM on Jan. 18, 2009

  • Constipation IS a medical issue for some children and if severe enough, it needs to be addressed by a doctor.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:36 AM on Jan. 18, 2009

  • Call your lawyer and get the ball rolling to keep her away from him. Call CPS, call the doctor, call whoever you need to call!

    Have her checked by a doctor now...he could have done some serious damage to her anus! That is just something that is NOT done!

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:11 AM on Jan. 18, 2009

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