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How long is a good time to wait til you have your second child??

My daughter is 10 months old. I am stuck on having only 1 child now that she is here. She is awesome! She is always so well behaved and I just can't imagine having another and her changing into a demon child like some say happen. I just want to have 1 so we can afford everything she'll need w/o any problems, as for if we have more then it limit what they both can have?I just don't want her to be lonely, but I don't want her to behave badly for attention as some say happens when a bro/sis is added to the picture. My husband wants another so badly NOW and I'm not ready. Like I said before I'm not positive if I want another?What do you suggest?*How long did you wait til you had your 2nd? Would you have waited longer?*If you only chose to have one, would you change it? Lonely?Spoiled?

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MarlasMommy

Asked by MarlasMommy at 10:27 PM on Jan. 18, 2009 in Pregnancy

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Answers (10)
  • My decision was pretty much made for me because of medical issues, so I will have only one child. I really really wanted another one till about a year ago though. Now that my little boy is 2 1/2 and has a mind of his own, I am sometimes glad I could only have one. LOL He is a really really well behaved kid and doesn't get in much trouble, but he is still a handful the older he gets. If things had been ideal though, I would have waited the recommended 18 months between pregnancies. They say if you get pregnant before 18 months then you and the baby are at more risks for certain things. I was already incredibly high risk, so I played everything safe. Good luck to you in making your decision. Your DD is still young and you don't have to make the decision now.
    AlliO2

    Answer by AlliO2 at 10:32 PM on Jan. 18, 2009

  • I think at least 2 years. I personally am going to wait 4, if we have another.
    theosgirl45

    Answer by theosgirl45 at 10:33 PM on Jan. 18, 2009

  • My son is 3 1/2. We started trying 7 months ago to have another, just found out last we we finally did it. I think never wait to long, because you never know how long it will take. I think 2 to 3 years is best for our family, but I don't think you can go into mother hood half hearted. If your heart isn't there wait a bit longer.

    Simonsmama

    Answer by Simonsmama at 10:35 PM on Jan. 18, 2009

  • i would say any wheres between 2- 4 years or soon depending on you but no more than 5 .... children only act out and act badly because there parents let them get away with it
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:40 PM on Jan. 18, 2009

  • We started trying when our son was 9 months old... we didn't want them to be too far apart. We didn't actually conceive until he was 18 months old. I have heard that 2 years is pretty good, but it is really something that you have to be ready for. It is something that is different for each family. I want 4 kids, but if you only want one, then that is what is right for you.
    reflect1light

    Answer by reflect1light at 10:43 PM on Jan. 18, 2009

  • Our rule is going to be, no new babies until the one before it is potty trained. So, I'm hoping Zackary is potty trained by two and a half, so he can have a baby brother or sister when he is a little over 3.
    Rebecca7708

    Answer by Rebecca7708 at 11:07 PM on Jan. 18, 2009

  • For me... I know I wanted two children before I turned 30. I wanted more than one for sure because I'm the only child. I have a 13 month old daughter and I'm 21 weeks pregnant with a boy! So, one of each is perfect! I wanted my kids close in age too. My hubby and I are very excited!
    GreekMama28

    Answer by GreekMama28 at 11:44 PM on Jan. 18, 2009

  • My son was 2 and a half when he sister was born. He LOVES being a big brother. He never turned into a demon. He was an easy going kid, he's still an easy going kid. He's very protective of her, and they are the best of friends. Two and a half was a good age because he understood when I couldn't get him something right away because I was nursing, and he was old enough to feed himself if I made him cereal or something similar. We're having our third, literally, tomorrow. Now my son is 4 and a half, my daughter is two. Fun times in our house! :)
    Serafyna

    Answer by Serafyna at 12:12 AM on Jan. 19, 2009

  • I got pregnant when our son was 14 months - it was a bit of a surprise & I thought I had lost my mind while I was pregnant!! However, he's a great big brother, and I love them being so close in age - they are each 22 1/2 months apart. Yes it was crazy having 3 kids under 4 for awhile, but it's getting better now that they're getting older (they're 6, 4, & 2).
    Navywifenmom

    Answer by Navywifenmom at 3:03 PM on Jan. 19, 2009

  • Thank you guys so much! Alot of what was said gives me alot of insight into the way I was feeling. We wanted a boy to begin with and when we had a girl I melted! She has us both wrapped around her little fingers. I just adore her so much, and I am afraid to have favoritism or anything like that..... Any of you ever notice you do anything like that with a second child? But we are thinking 2 years or so, but as a mother stated above I know for sure that I don't want another til my heart is ready for another, and that my heart is FULLY into it. Cause my husband wants a boy & a girl, but what if we have another girl? Does that mean he wants 3? I just don't want to keep having children just to have a certain sex baby................ The sex doesn't matter to me, as long as they are healthy I am as happy as can be!
    MarlasMommy

    Answer by MarlasMommy at 9:44 PM on Jan. 19, 2009

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