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Several weeks ago, I told my husband I wanted a divorce...I don't feel important at all, he yells, is always right and so much more I don't want to get into. Well, about 2 weeks after I told him this, he starts acting like I never said it...he doesn't want a divorce at all...probably because I've been his sugar momma for 5 years and he hasn't had to hold down a job cause in the back of his mind he knows I will handle things. He has had 3 jobs since we got married...he started the 4th one last night. The first 3 he didn't keep more than 5 months. I told him I wouldn't live this way anymore, he can't just up and quit cause he gets pissed off...we have a family to provide for and I need his help to do that financially, my pay barely covers the bills. He seemed to be trying to straighten up and do better so I was trying to give us another chance since I do love him...
so, anyway, back to my question...he started his new job last night, delivering pizzas...I sent him a text around 9 letting him know my phone battery was dying so I would be unreachable...he responded w/ an okay. So I wake up at 1:20 in the morning and he still isn't home...the pizza place closes at 10...so I figured if he had to help clean, he would be late getting home...no biggie. I had a hard time falling back asleep...at 3:30, he finally comes home, I'm still awake. I had been so worried but since my cell was dead, I couldn't contact him (he had our only charger with him for our phones). I asked how late he got off...he clocked out just after 10 p.m. but had gone to a friend's house and lost track of time. He said he tried to call but it went straight to voicemail so he figured it had died on me.
Now, since my phone was dead and he didn't tell me ahead of time he was going to a friends after work, I think he should have come straight home from work. I'm upset that he didn't even care when he got home that I had been up most of the night worried about him...I lost track of time is all he could say, not even any apology. I come straight home from work everyday unless I have to stop at the store and he always knows when I have to do this. Part of my problem with him is I don't feel I'm important, me or the kids...cause he won't help provide for us and he gets so mad so easily. I told him he made me feel disposable...and he said he didn't want me to feel that way cause he didn't see it that way but actions sure do speak louder than words. I'm just wondering if I'm overreacting...I haven't told him I'm upset cause I didn't want to overreact...and I just know when I tell him I'm upset, it will somehow be my fault cause it is always my fault. I thought things were changing...maybe I was wrong. I got 2 hours of sleep cause I was so upset after he got home and I found out why he was so late. (and he tells me I should be proud of him cause he had self control and didn't get trashed while hanging out with his friend...yeah, okay, whatever is how I feel about that).
Can I get some insight from you ladies...you always have such great advise...I'm just so lost and confused. Would you be upset...before I go telling him how upset he made me, thought maybe I would get others' points...I don't want to fly off the handle for silly reasons if it is. I'm operating on 2 hours of sleep and had to be at work at 8 and don't get off till 5...it has been a long morning and this is bothering me which is making the day even worse. Please help
Answer by NannyB. at 12:29 PM on Feb. 22, 2012
Answer by robinkane at 11:54 AM on Feb. 22, 2012
Answer by TeachMom41 at 12:11 PM on Feb. 22, 2012
Answer by gdiamante at 12:16 PM on Feb. 22, 2012
Answer by tasches at 8:13 PM on Feb. 22, 2012
Answer by SandyHack at 11:27 AM on Feb. 22, 2012
Answer by onelove1982 at 1:43 PM on Feb. 22, 2012