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I am so confused right now!

So I have a baby boy that is 8 months old. I was married to his father. He left me for another woman, yada yada... Now I'm living with a boyfriend of five months, and I am not exactly sure I am happy. I catch myself wondering what I got myself into sometimes. My ex husband told me yesterday that he was sorry for the way he acted, and he wants me back...that he will wait as long as it takes for me to decide whether or not its what I want... Opinions? I love my ex iwth all my heart, and I want a whole family again... Just not sure if I should try to make that whole family with him.

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Mummyofone

Asked by Mummyofone at 1:04 PM on Jan. 19, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (17)
  • Why does the ex want you back? Did it not work out with the other woman? Personally, I would have a hard time reconciling with someone who decided they wanted someone else.
    alysmommy0909

    Answer by alysmommy0909 at 1:06 PM on Jan. 19, 2009

  • it's perfectly ok to forgive him but only you can decide that. you have alot of thinking and soul searching to do good luck
    teresalangston

    Answer by teresalangston at 1:07 PM on Jan. 19, 2009

  • You should make you and that baby a family... leave the boyfriend alone... he doesn't deserve to be thinking that he has you when he don't. And the ex.... he doesn't deserve to have you right now either. I think you should move out, get your own place and give the ex a year to see what is going to happen.... but this should be about you and your child... first.
    PaceMyself

    Answer by PaceMyself at 1:09 PM on Jan. 19, 2009

  • He told me he realized that he made a stupid mistake. No it didn't work out with the other woman, but I am a firm believer in till death do us part, and it kills me to see my sons dad and to know that my son won't get a whole family. I want to reconcile, but I'm in a relationship and I feel as though I can't just walk out.
    Mummyofone

    Answer by Mummyofone at 1:09 PM on Jan. 19, 2009

  • If you decide to take him back make counseling the condition. Do not start an intimate relationship until your therapist thinks its healthy. Make sure he understands that his fickle mind is hurting his family.
    Farrahann

    Answer by Farrahann at 1:09 PM on Jan. 19, 2009

  • My personal opinion? Live your life by yourself with just your son. Get your own independence, career, and head straight so you won't have to worry about a relationship with another man. If your ex is willing to wait and you both love each other in years to come once you have yourself established in life, then it's worth considering. But bouncing back and forth is not good or fair for you or your son. I wish you all the best.
    PrydferthMenyw

    Answer by PrydferthMenyw at 1:10 PM on Jan. 19, 2009

  • My boyfriend had me until I moved in with him...that saying you never truly know someone until you live with them? Falls under this category.
    Mummyofone

    Answer by Mummyofone at 1:10 PM on Jan. 19, 2009

  • I've always said once a cheater..always a cheater, but some men make stupid choices, and some men learn from them, and some don't. Can you forgive him for what he did? Your trust in him has been broken and thats going to make it really hard for you to be with him. I mean are you always gonna be wondering where hes at, or whos he with...things like that...Folow your heart hun....
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:11 PM on Jan. 19, 2009

  • I personally would only do it if he would understand that there would be conditions and this is all on your terms. I would find a good marrige councilor first and it would have to be someone you both agree on. I would not have sex with him for a long time. I would take it veeeeeerrrrrrryyyy sssssllllloooowww. I hope everything works out the way you want and I am all for families getting back together.
    SgrplmsnSnflwrs

    Answer by SgrplmsnSnflwrs at 1:13 PM on Jan. 19, 2009

  • Sounds like your current man was a rebound to me. If you want to go back to the ex, then do it but I'd suggest councelling first. You have to be able to forgive what he did and let it go completely or it will never work. Don't make the same mistake again and jump right from one to the other, as you already know, sometimes it just doesn't work and leaves you wondering what you were thinking. Be on your own and date the ex if you want, but dont' jump right back in.
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 1:16 PM on Jan. 19, 2009

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